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Heaven's Tears
Contributed by
maciej
on
Sunday, 17th September 2006 @ 06:43:25 PM in AEST
Topic:
war
|
Heaven’s tears from above
Falling with a mute thud
Unto bodies, nameless now
Souls of men drifting up
Through the silent thud
Bodies rigid , without a breath
Lips shut, eyes open wide
Air full of speeding metal
Trying to stop heaven’s tears from falling
Buzzing above the silent thud
Hitting drops as they go
Finding closure in a skull
Then out of the silence
With no scream audible
Comes a chilling thud
As quickly as it began
It is over
Another nameless body
Lay with its bretherin
All is silent again
Except for the rythmic thumping
Of heaven’s tears.
Copyright ©
maciej
... [
2006-09-17 18:43:25]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Heaven's Tears
(User Rating: 1 )
by Alison on
Sunday, 17th September 2006 @ 07:18:41 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
| wow i really like the way you wrote this! great job |
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Re: Heaven's Tears
(User Rating: 1 )
by twbanter on
Monday, 18th September 2006 @ 09:03:54 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
Okay, you want comments... here's one.
Great job. I felt the senselessness of war in this, and it was well described here.
ALL war is, incidently, senless. Have you read Patriots son? It screams a simular message...
Tom W |
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Re: Heaven's Tears
(User Rating: 1 )
by Lionel on
Monday, 18th September 2006 @ 06:57:12 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| That's war, be it two people fighting or two nations. I think consideration should be given to who started it, and why. Some people on this site, apparently, do not. Good write though. God bless |
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Re: Heaven's Tears
(User Rating: 1 )
by northernlights on
Wednesday, 19th May 2010 @ 10:54:43 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Beautiful write,Souls of men drifting up, a whole long relentless process of loss of life while heaven cries, this really moved me |
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