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Forget-me-not
Contributed by
keilantra
on
Thursday, 14th September 2006 @ 08:44:16 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
_______________________________
These days I feel the cobwebs inside me sway
Whenever the wind blows.
And I’m never face to face with winter anymore.
It all goes back
To when I found my tears in your dirty laundry,
shoved carelessly in your back pockets and mixed with change.
Some kind of…
forgotten memento.
I laid myself down in the snow
And soiled it through your clothes-
-Sweat, blood and three days worth heartbreak and grime-
My kind of forget-me-not.
I left before sundown
Because it was one of those things
You knew you couldn’t just talk about.
If it had meant more, right now I would be hurting.
Now I make love to my strophes (to keep from being lonely)
Kiss my pages and caress my words,
Close my eyes and pretended you still know who I am.
Copyright ©
keilantra
... [
2006-09-14 20:44:16]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Forget-me-not
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Friday, 15th September 2006 @ 12:27:25 AM AEST
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a Message)
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................... God, how does one comment on this???
I found meaning even in the fact that you didn't put this into one of YPDC's neat little poetry categories (I've found, myself, that the list of options simply isn't so all inclusive as to provide a proper indication of 'type' for everything that can be written about).
This piece is exquisite in its truth and its potent descriptions. I used to think it was possible to write everything... I've come, of late, to believe that simply isn't true. The best we can do is to get the true essence of it on the page and to understand that some things defy full expression. You have put enough here, though, that it rattles some dark corner in my core... some spot that nods in agreement but refuses to admit that it feels an inate familiarity with the essence of this. I suspect I wish it didn't about near as much as you wish you hadn't the inspiration to pen this.
Your last three lines would be heartbreaking, but for this eternal optomist's belief that someday there will be one that knows the depth and fullness of their meaning and is infinitely moved because they do. I do hope that your journey to that one is nowhere near as long as it might feel right now. *hugs*
~Snemmy |
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Re: Forget-me-not
(User Rating: 1 )
by Spike on
Friday, 15th September 2006 @ 08:56:48 AM AEST
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Snem's right, a emotionally raw and very well crafted reflection on betrayal. But beware those stresses, those poetic conclusions and syllabic seductions - they'll love you and leave you, just like the rest.
Spike |
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Re: Forget-me-not
(User Rating: 1 )
by Grae on
Tuesday, 3rd March 2009 @ 09:25:16 PM AEST
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| TRULY TRUTHFUL |
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