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Eternal Dreams

Contributed by candysears on Monday, 28th August 2006 @ 11:55:44 AM in AEST
Topic: spiritual



In the sleep of eternal dreams
Bring peace..
A garden of beauty awaits,
So I’d been told,
My safe haven…..
When I awaken inside the
Golden gate
No more tears, no more
Pain
Cries of sorrow cease to
Swept through the land
No more shrouds of
Darkens damp cold soil
To beckon for my mortal
Body,
The churning seas will know
Longer seek me out in vain,
The destiny of my soul will
Ride upon the rainbow
Amid the city of heaven
Where angels sing…
Celebrating the rebirth of
My soul..




Copyright © candysears ... [ 2006-08-28 11:55:44]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Eternal Dreams (User Rating: 1 )
by amaya_h_k on Monday, 28th August 2006 @ 12:53:01 PM AEST
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this is a very good poem, I really enjoyed it. There are a few errors in it though. Other than that it was wonderful.


Re: Eternal Dreams (User Rating: 1 )
by twbanter on Monday, 28th August 2006 @ 04:27:19 PM AEST
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Why not put "will" in front of ride? Just curious. Nice write...
The churning Seas will Know
and seek me out in vain
The destiny of my soul
will ride (upon) a rainbow

Upon is optional here, I wouldn't include it myself.

Hope you're not ofended, I wish for help as well... (God knows I need it!)

Good concept...

Tom W


Re: Eternal Dreams (User Rating: 1 )
by Man_On_High on Monday, 28th August 2006 @ 06:27:55 PM AEST
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Lovely my friend~
paradise awaits you.. though I hope you don't plan
on leaving anytime soon~

B


Re: Eternal Dreams (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Monday, 28th August 2006 @ 06:59:46 PM AEST
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"Celebrating the rebirth of
My soul.."


candy, that last bit is so amazingly inspiring!!
This was such a beautiful write. Very peaceful
and serene. Almost dreamlike ..

~Breezy


Re: Eternal Dreams (User Rating: 1 )
by Jeff_Scott_Morehead on Saturday, 2nd September 2006 @ 09:44:09 AM AEST
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Freat write...enjoyable read.
Jeff


Re: Eternal Dreams (User Rating: 1 )
by unknown_utopia on Friday, 18th May 2007 @ 10:38:00 AM AEST
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I wanna ride upon a rainbow
good flow




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