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Contributed by
somnium
on
Tuesday, 25th July 2006 @ 11:44:33 AM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
I sit
And bleed
And hate
And love
And scream
And call your name
I sit
And cry
And moan
And burn
With pride
You left me none
I lie
And yet
I tell
You all
The honest
Truth I am
For I
Will sit
And scream
And moan
Till you,
My love, return
Copyright ©
somnium
... [
2006-07-25 11:44:33]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Return
(User Rating: 1 )
by Keilantra on
Tuesday, 25th July 2006 @ 12:14:06 PM AEST
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a Message)
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i really liked the second and thid stanzas. good write.
xXx
~kei
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Re: Return
(User Rating: 1 )
by Sagefairy on
Tuesday, 25th July 2006 @ 12:23:17 PM AEST
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Strange. Because I know the one I love went through this and yet I remained calm the whole time. I suppose it's because I have to work to earn my way to him, and I was still doing that even while missing his presence...
I have to say, it sort of reads like the seven stages of death in a way. I suppose there's something profound in that - something in us of identity and happiness dies in the absence of a loved one. And we mourn.
Good work on an open honest write. J. |
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Re: Return
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Tuesday, 25th July 2006 @ 04:07:09 PM AEST
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I like this. Obviously a quick read, but still impactful and with a good rhythm. I'm not sure why (or even if I'm right), but I have this feeling that many of us have written something like this along the way (similar in structure, I mean). There's a need sometimes to just get some words on the page even if it seems insanely concise. Sometimes I think it's either just too hard or simply unnecessary (I'm not sure which) to write at length in that moment. I hope, for you, it was the latter.
Take care -
~Snemmy |
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Re: Return
(User Rating: 1 )
by darkangeleyes57 on
Tuesday, 19th September 2006 @ 08:46:59 AM AEST
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Loved this.. I can relate 100 percent... But unfortunatly at the time my love never returned but now i am with someone else whom i don't have to wait and do all of the above because with him i am never alone... this was a very well expressed poem... I liked it alot..
Take care
christina |
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