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Brain In A Jar
Contributed by
deadclown
on
Tuesday, 18th July 2006 @ 07:19:49 AM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
The blackness of your heartfelt words
are eating at my brain
I know you're hungry for those words
that make you go insane
My memory isn't what it was
or how it ought to be
So take the other parts I have
and leave my mind for me
I've really nothing here for you
cos what is left is mine
They've taken all the vital parts
and wrapped them up in twine
Someday they say I'll get them back
but I know that's a lie
'til then I'll just stay in this jar
cos otherwise I'll die
The cold that sets inside my thoughts
turns numb cos I can't speak
I'd like to go out for a walk
but I have got no feet
besides the fact I have no legs
and still I have no head
So therefore I can only wait
'til they pronounce me dead
Copyright ©
deadclown
... [
2006-07-18 07:19:49]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Brain In A Jar
(User Rating: 1 )
by Angel16 on
Tuesday, 18th July 2006 @ 09:26:29 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
*Wow; interesting choice of words~and it is a
really good poem. |
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Re: Brain In A Jar
(User Rating: 1 )
by wakemeup6 on
Tuesday, 18th July 2006 @ 09:37:13 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Good job. I like it a loooot. |
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Re: Brain In A Jar
(User Rating: 1 )
by drtylilsecret on
Tuesday, 18th July 2006 @ 10:10:19 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
loved the way you described the whole being alive but actually dead thing. dark, fantastic.
~natalya |
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Re: Brain In A Jar
(User Rating: 1 )
by Ruby2sdy on
Tuesday, 18th July 2006 @ 10:41:21 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
Very nice, somehow I was expecting something different... but I really enjoyed whta I got! It reminded me of that film where the guy falls in love with the brain in a jar... for obvious reasons... it's a little darker than that though!!! Awesome, kudos,
2sdyx |
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Re: Brain In A Jar
(User Rating: 1 )
by Lilbabe on
Tuesday, 18th July 2006 @ 03:29:30 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
that was really different than most poems...in a good way. well written.
lex |
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Re: Brain In A Jar
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vampirequeen on
Tuesday, 18th July 2006 @ 07:34:44 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
| very interesting and different write then i have read so far.I enjoy it thanks for sharing |
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Re: Brain In A Jar
(User Rating: 1 )
by Ripper_Something_Unusual on
Tuesday, 18th July 2006 @ 07:46:52 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
| Middle stanza was okay, I wasnt to fond on the rest. It is all a little too angsty. No problem though. Alot of my earlier stuff was much worse than this. Kudos buddy. |
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