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as lovers go....
Contributed by
ddannyc
on
Friday, 14th July 2006 @ 11:47:14 AM in AEST
Topic:
SongLyrics
|
.lover came.
.with lovers rules.
.love is gone
.im lovers fool.
.lovers love.
.and love is cruel.
.a lovers game.
.its lovers rule.
.love is pain,I try & hide.
.its lovers love
.its lovers pride.
Copyright ©
ddannyc
... [
2006-07-14 11:47:14] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: as lovers go....
(User Rating: 1 ) by Keilantra on
Friday, 14th July 2006 @ 02:19:38 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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This was short sweet and beautiful in its simplicity.
keep it up~
xXx
~kei |
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Re: as lovers go....
(User Rating: 1 ) by Tricia on
Friday, 14th July 2006 @ 03:39:18 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I love this poem. |
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Re: as lovers go....
(User Rating: 1 ) by weepingprophet on
Saturday, 15th July 2006 @ 01:37:15 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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It was not my style as you used the word "love" thirteen times in eleven lines. I do not mean to be insulting but honestly, I know eight year olds who could have said it better. It's not that you don't have potential its that you haven't recognized it fully yet. Keep experimenting with your ideas but please try to broaden them. This piece was as useful as saying love and nothing else, it went nowhere as it started nowhere. Let me know if you make any changes.
~We are two shivering lies, until I drop the truth like a grenade~weepingprophet |
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Re: as lovers go....
(User Rating: 1 ) by redsleeve on
Tuesday, 9th September 2008 @ 07:09:15 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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great post.
so simple, yet so effective. |
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