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i walked into a dream
Contributed by
POH
on
Monday, 19th June 2006 @ 12:40:19 PM in AEST
Topic:
surreal
|
when she walked out of that door
i walked into a dream
we held us desperately
before any greeting
loving this intimately
needs no formal meeting
"eternity has passed…"
said she in a heavenly way
"…since i last saw your face"
was it not more than that?
"it was centuries ago, yesterday,
that we last did embrace"
touch was thought
kiss was speech
words mean nothing;
stars are in reach
flowers hold no place
to the garden of her face
"beloved, do you not…"
said she, pushing away
"…feel that something is wrong?"
"my darling, no…"
i said in dismay
"…i had only began to hear your song!"
then she walked pass, as if a stranger
i had forgotten; i walked into a dream
Copyright ©
POH
... [
2006-06-19 12:40:19]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: i walked into a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 19th June 2006 @ 03:46:31 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I love the idea behind this, and the format is both original AND works!
Oh..should "pass" be Passed?, other than that I think this is a very cleverly done and craetive piece! |
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Re: i walked into a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 19th June 2006 @ 10:51:43 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Wonderfully thought-provoking and emotionally stirring..
I loved this passage ..
"touch was thought
kiss was speech
words mean nothing;
stars are in reach"
so soft - so delicate..
Beautiful post.
~Breezy
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Re: i walked into a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Tuesday, 20th June 2006 @ 12:49:35 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Incredible! I like how you weaved this together and it seemed so real reading it yet you had it as a dream! Loved it.
Michelle |
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Re: i walked into a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Davinah on
Tuesday, 20th June 2006 @ 09:05:53 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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This is such a sweet poem.... Very beautiful!
~Davinah~ |
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