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Aluminum skies
Contributed by
iodinelove
on
Thursday, 1st June 2006 @ 01:11:40 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
Aluminum skies shift treacherously; a small and shoddy star tumbles lifelessly; the horizon swallows the moon, and our faces bear the pain. Mesh wire windows clutter my reflection; a haggard king born a peasant hand and tears to mount the sun, a blue-eyed shadow skirting the mountains of his own soul; lost in the hollow beckoning of her voice sounding down the hall.
Ignore the screams.
I wait, stand lithely at the window, am consumed by fear, am bone dry waiting for the comforts of the rain.
Her screams are clawing at my eyes, but I am strong; I am cement strong sipping up the sun; I am iron and steel, the first aluminum sky, sipping a cup of coffee to kill my sleep.
“Soon now,” The Dr said, a bespectacled and mousy woman, shifting the sands of her hair with a trembling, cautious hand. “It’ll be soon now, there’s nothing we can do.”
The window slipped down around my hands, the rain collapsed the coming day, and I saw the sun.
I saw the sun, and the screaming finally stopped.
Copyright ©
iodinelove
... [
2006-06-01 13:11:40]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Aluminum skies
(User Rating: 1 )
by slayer_015 on
Thursday, 1st June 2006 @ 02:28:56 PM AEST
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My kind of poem.
Breathtaking!!!!!!!!!!!!
Brian |
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Re: Aluminum skies
(User Rating: 1 )
by richcol7522 on
Thursday, 1st June 2006 @ 03:41:45 PM AEST
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It was very good..I will have to read it again...keep up the good work.
rich |
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Re: Aluminum skies
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Thursday, 1st June 2006 @ 04:01:24 PM AEST
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I think you have a wonderful way with words.
It's like you take all these things, these unrelated things, and put them together in a way that stands out and makes sense.
It's clever.
I love the way your words roll together, and the way you set your writing out.
But mostly I love the lines. Blunt and spine tingling.
Well done.
Great write.
Phil xxx |
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Re: Aluminum skies
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Thursday, 1st June 2006 @ 06:03:14 PM AEST
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Methinks this is one of your best, Abraham. Beautiful, haunting words, all kinds of fresh imagery, down to the title, and just wonderfully spun together. I needed this piece of refreshment.
Andrew |
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