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The last laugh

Contributed by somnium on Wednesday, 24th May 2006 @ 02:23:47 PM in AEST
Topic: DarkPoetry

You lay me down
and you beat me
You let me drown
To defeat me

You seperate
The wheat from chaff
You full of hate
Had the last laugh

I rose again
For my revenge
I breathed again
So to avenge

I lay you down
To destroy you
I killed your frown
To implore you

Call you to die
And so the staff
Of hell watched as I
Had the last laugh

Copyright © somnium ... [ 2006-05-24 14:23:47]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: The last laugh (User Rating: 1 )
by blackprayer on Wednesday, 24th May 2006 @ 02:38:54 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Very angry poem and I did like it. IMHO: I just feel you could have added some words to create full sentences to add some power to the poem... Just my thoughts. That and I wouldn't try so overly hard to rhyme... That's just me though. :)

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