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Understood
Contributed by
sararose1950
on
Thursday, 11th May 2006 @ 07:53:36 PM in AEST
Topic:
Lifepoems
|
She walks a path, by choice, alone;
no place found ever, to call her home.
In the Light she dances wild and free;
with the Darkness, she walks, in harmony.
No difference sees she, between the sides;
in balance, her essence does reside.
They label her; would hurt her if they could;
when all she ever longed for, was to be.. ..understood.
Copyright ©
sararose1950
... [
2006-05-11 19:53:36]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Understood
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Thursday, 11th May 2006 @ 08:28:35 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Not bad, in fact good. Though I feel the pause before the last word is a little clichéd - it would be better left to the natural flow of the line, methinks.
Ellipses (...) should be used sparingly, or they overpower the flow of the piece.
Keep writing.
Andrew |
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Re: Understood
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 12th May 2006 @ 03:03:24 PM AEST
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your first writting in months huh/?u could have fooled me, all i hear is your heart talking. I like what it has 2 say. A most lovely peice of writting.
Ben |
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Re: Understood
(User Rating: 1 )
by Elizabeth_Dandy on
Friday, 12th May 2006 @ 06:52:24 PM AEST
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Splendid writing Sara. And very pertinent. I like especially the lines:
"In the Light she dances wild and free;
with the Darkness, she walks, in harmony"
That is exactly what man has to do,
Be able to dwell in the light, (Spirit) but also be comfortable in the dark (Soul where the hard work is going on.to be unified.
Very deep poem.
Thanks for sharing.(notice I got in)
Peace and lLght
Elizabeth |
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