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Falling Forward
Contributed by
desolantdreamer
on
Monday, 8th May 2006 @ 01:51:46 PM in AEST
Topic:
Suicide
|
Standing here
Rain falling, heart throbbing
I stare into your window
So warm and so happy
Filled with broken promises and false hope
Naked on the bed I watch you sleeping
That pay-for-pleasure laying next to you
My shirt adorning her fake self
I'm falling forward
Into hate
I'm falling farther
Outta reach
You wake with a start
Nightmare so strong
You saw me in your window
Writing your name in my blood
Three words make your body shiver
I'm falling forward
You stare at my pale, bleeding form
My eyes full of anger
I watch as you run towards me
Slamming against the clear barrier
Holding me away
I start falling forward
Into the blood-stained snow
'Hate' slashed into my wrists
I'm falling forward
Into darkness
I'm falling forward
You made your last mistake
Copyright ©
desolantdreamer
... [
2006-05-08 13:51:46]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Falling Forward
(User Rating: 1 )
by expired_promises on
Monday, 8th May 2006 @ 04:46:43 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
wow. your poem is very intense. your writing is to the point and all the more moving because of it.
your title is wonderful and caught my eye right away. i always think finding the right title is one of the hardest parts of writing a poem. well done.
also please remember that there are so many people in the world whose screw-ups are going to hurt other people. the best way to be content with your life is to make sure you are satisfied with your OWN actions and self. when someone else lets you down in such an awful way they aren't worth it anymore. but taking care of yourself is. please keep releasing hurt and anger in poetry and never on yourself. |
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Re: Falling Forward
(User Rating: 1 )
by drhousexo3 on
Monday, 25th February 2008 @ 01:30:12 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| Very intense. It sent a shiver down the spine; but the comment before me is right it does get straight to the point and very percisely does so which makes it that much more meaningful. Very well written and its clear you have talent so make sure to keep using it! |
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