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sleeping waking sleeping
Contributed by
zelator
on
Friday, 5th May 2006 @ 02:43:05 AM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
Two heroes
We came upon each other
In the tangled forest
And earth vines
Cutting our own paths
With Swords of Hope
Glinting in the northern lights
And found a clearing
And paused a while
Us two;
To take in colours
And roam some small corners
Present in the circle.
Found a honey flower
And drank a while
Entwined;
Thought we were one.
Then down through the southern sky
Octaves descending
The velvet moans and calls
Of the sleepers
Broke our joining for a moment;
And through those cracks
sharp chords
Seeped
And echoed in our ears
And we sought to dance another tune;
And danced;
Until we found
Our feet were buried
Deep
And dancing no more.
And heroes
Us both
Lost our mirror
Turned away
Now
I and you
Though shocked and battered
Turn our ears again
To Grace
And listen, eager
For the melody that guides us home,
No longer Holding Hands;
To march through tangled boughs
and walk the virgin scree
with bloodied knees
But tender yearnings
Turned once more to God
Copyright ©
zelator
... [
2006-05-05 02:43:05]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: sleeping waking sleeping
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Friday, 5th May 2006 @ 03:21:14 AM AEST
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a Message)
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This is frankly quite beautiful. It has the echoes of several old Irish legends, of which I am inordinately fond, by the way.
Well done! The mythic tone is not seen too often these days, and that's rather sad.
Slàinte, agus slàn leat an-drasda.
Andrew |
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Re: sleeping waking sleeping
(User Rating: 1 )
by xAegisx on
Friday, 5th May 2006 @ 06:41:40 AM AEST
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| the second stanza had some fragmented ideas and seemed a little random but overall a good write. |
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Re: sleeping waking sleeping
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Friday, 5th May 2006 @ 02:27:23 PM AEST
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Wow...
You know, I am not suprised to see that Andrew has posted a comment on this. He, actually said most of what I want to say. I agree with him about this a lot.
I love this, it's wonderful, beautiful and peaceful. The imagery is fantastic.
Great write.
*hugs*
Phyllis xxx |
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Re: sleeping waking sleeping
(User Rating: 1 )
by thumper on
Saturday, 6th May 2006 @ 12:28:10 AM AEST
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Wow! The imagery and wording is so beautifully done. What a wonderful soul you must have. I'm not a critic, but I like what I like. I definately like this. Bravo! I WILL be reading more of your stuff.
Peace to Ya,
Thumper ;o) |
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