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Dare You To Try
Contributed by
keilantra
on
Wednesday, 3rd May 2006 @ 04:36:00 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
I dare you to love me
I dare you to try
I dare you to feel
I dare you to cry.
You're so frigid and stiff
I never see you smile
Your constantly pulling away
Like you're afraid to be defiled
You leave me tasting like a bad decision
Stop walking away
Lift up your eyes
Look this way
You're pitiful and broken
But you put on a nice show
Blend in with the nobodies
Beacuase nobody needs to know
Your scared of love
And lacking compassion
I offered myself
But you saw no attaction.
You dont know how to feel
You dont know how to cry
Shall you forever be lonely?
i dare you to try
And be different from anybody and everybody...
I dare you to to love me
Dare you to fly
Dare to to sing
Dare You toi try
Copyright ©
keilantra
... [
2006-05-03 16:36:00]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Dare You To Try
(User Rating: 1 )
by ham323 on
Wednesday, 3rd May 2006 @ 06:09:08 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Hmm. Like the poem. Seems kinda angry you know? Good stuff. |
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Re: Dare You To Try
(User Rating: 1 )
by Drapes on
Wednesday, 3rd May 2006 @ 07:00:16 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Pretty good. I tried to write one somewhat like this but this is way better. Nice job.
-Drapes |
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Re: Dare You To Try
(User Rating: 1 )
by MG_Akela22090 on
Wednesday, 3rd May 2006 @ 08:18:03 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| OMG!!! I love this, it's simple but absolutly wonderful! keep writitng, this is great! |
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Re: Dare You To Try
(User Rating: 1 )
by wizard on
Wednesday, 3rd May 2006 @ 10:19:21 PM AEST
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a Message)
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this was nicely done.
dare away!
wiz |
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Re: Dare You To Try
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 4th May 2006 @ 12:10:49 AM AEST
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a Message)
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A very well written and freeing read! I enjoyed this tremendously. Though I must say at first I misread the first line of stanza two. I thought it read "You are so frigid and stuff." I thought this was a sore thumb, until I read it again. Great job all around. Keep up the superb work. Your talent is on fire!
SCM |
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Re: Dare You To Try
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 4th May 2006 @ 07:39:24 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Go girl! Call it like ya see it, don't mince words - I dare ya.
Really enjoyed this one. You are opening up and crossing some boundries I didn't see in some of your earlier posts.
And the words are flowing and your able to use your talents more freely. Keep it up!
wabl
KenMoore
cowboy |
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Re: Dare You To Try
(User Rating: 1 )
by ElliotRS on
Sunday, 7th May 2006 @ 12:04:47 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Very nice job! I like how you keep testing the person to take a risk its quite lovely. |
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Re: Dare You To Try
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 9th May 2006 @ 05:26:13 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Thanks for your comments and the use of my words as a signature. very flattering. i like this one a lot. lots of clever lexical choices. um.. yeah. was very good.
thanks |
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