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ice amd water (frozen air)
Contributed by
iodinelove
on
Monday, 10th April 2006 @ 05:15:35 PM in AEST
Topic:
abstract
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hidden scarlet races burn black before the night is an emptiness stealing the stars with its grace lifting heaven softly singing an emphasis into the way of love.
remembering the water placid frozen denying my hands to take her hands
her under the ice her face smiling under the ice clouding her eyes going to God
screaming somewhere unheard watching her eyes fog go gray the broken ice the rain and snow
remembering the softness of her hair the silk suddenly slipping into sleep singing softly in her sleep i lay and listen cupping her hair in my hands the moonlight salting the shadows silver.
the ice is a lie she said the ice and water it's strong enough i said the ice and water holding my weight
then cold cold water losing breath tumbling feeling stone above feeling her hair grabbing slipping swimming surface broken surface gasping air somewhere screaming unheard the placid frozen water denying my lungs the frozen air.
And then remembering her mothers slap and anger too afraid to cry too afraid to understand.
Let me sing her soft and sudden song
a grace to lift the heavens scarlet strength
Let me sing her song
the silk and sorrow slipping into sleep.
Let me be forgiven.
Copyright ©
iodinelove
... [
2006-04-10 17:15:35] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: ice amd water (frozen air)
(User Rating: 1 ) by iodinelove on
Monday, 10th April 2006 @ 05:17:51 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Ice AND Water ^_^ silly me ^_^
alway's abraham |
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Re: ice amd water (frozen air)
(User Rating: 1 ) by xAegisx on
Monday, 10th April 2006 @ 05:25:23 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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i love this one a whole lot. the part of the mothers slap and anger seemed to come out of nowhere but it was a nice twist. |
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Re: ice amd water (frozen air)
(User Rating: 1 ) by Fionndruinne on
Monday, 10th April 2006 @ 05:49:27 PM AEST (User
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Beautiful ending. I've always been one more for coherent lines, but then the closing of this piece is coherent, and coalesces the words and emotion of the whole piece. Nicely done.
Andrew |
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