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A Single Flower
Contributed by
NoSaint
on
Friday, 24th February 2006 @ 09:37:38 PM in AEST
Topic:
SadPoetry
|
A single flower blooms
Where the river ends
He will be meeting her there soon
No use to pretend
Age has him feeble and weak
His vision blurred and bad
Once the mighty warrior, now meek
Once boisterous, now very sad
A single flower blows
As the wind passes by
Only God for sure knows
When the old man will die
But it has been many years
Since he ever really lived
For that flower has seen many tears
And his sins he can’t seem to forgive
A single flower wilts
No reason to bloom again
For next to her he sits
He has said his final Amen
Copyright ©
NoSaint
... [
2006-02-24 21:37:38]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: A Single Flower
(User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on
Friday, 24th February 2006 @ 09:42:23 PM AEST
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| Oh my Shari....that was so sad. Elderly man at the end of his life? That's what I saw in here. Good write. Peace, Laura |
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Re: A Single Flower
(User Rating: 1 )
by funnyface on
Friday, 24th February 2006 @ 09:53:46 PM AEST
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VERY NICE WORK , BUT THERE COMES A TIME IN EVERYBODY'S LIFE WHEN THEY HAVE TO DIE THE IMPORTANT THING TO REMEMBER IS THAT YOU HAVE A CHOICE FOR YOUR ETERNAL DESTINY. I REALLY LIKED THE POEM NICE WORK !!!!
YOUR FRIEND: FUNNYFACE |
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Re: A Single Flower
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Friday, 24th February 2006 @ 10:31:12 PM AEST
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~*Shari*~
So sad, yet so beautiful.
Thank you for all the wonderful work u post for us to read and treasure dearest friend. Keep up the great work.
*warm hugs*
~sue~. |
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Re: A Single Flower
(User Rating: 1 )
by eggflipper on
Friday, 24th February 2006 @ 11:09:52 PM AEST
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| A touching comment on the lives of love lived out. You have a wonderful way of catching the readers attention at the end that brings a proper closure to this work. |
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Re: A Single Flower
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 25th February 2006 @ 06:33:27 AM AEST
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A very sad write. Once again you astound me with your wide open story telling. I feel this is a gift of genius you have. In the past two works you have been able to lay out a blue print (or a skeleton) of a character, and a certain portion of their lives. You have allowed us as a reader to fill in the beginning, and the after. Even though here you seem to end the tale, to a spiritual person you have opened up a reality to an afterlife which does not make this as sad (spiritually) as it is on a completely human level.
You have allowed us to place our own visuals within the poem, which is something I deeply admire. For example when I read novels (something I do not spend enough time on lately but spent too much time when I was younger), I tend to lean towards the older writers. I like Nathaniel Hawthorne, and Joseph Conrad, and Earnest Hemingway. The reason I would rather read and older book over a modern book is because modern authors are overly descriptive. Take Stephen King for example. I think the man is in many ways a genius, but I do not need to read 300 to 400 words which elapse 3 three pages describing a tree. I want a simple yet intricate few words on it, and as a reader want to be able to establish my own surroundings with the small detail the writer has given me. I feel the same about poetry. Give me the story, and describe the emotions to the intricate end, but allow me to pitch my own surroundings. Allow me to create the wide open world. Give me some details so I understand the heart of the writer, but let me the reader accomplish the environment of the poem.
In one of my favorite poems "The Raven" (yes, I know that is a cliche favorite poem, but alas cliche is cliche for a reason), Poe describes the mood in very eloquent detail. He describes the surroundings only slight. Poe never said it was raining outside, but I always visualize a little drizzle, enough to gloss the limbs outside so that when he looks outside the moonlight makes the darkness a little silky. Now, Poe never gave me that. I was aloud to take that for myself. Just like to some it is snowing outside. Some people picture it on a summer night, I picture it on a autumn night.
Anyway, I may seem to have gone off topic, but indeed I am making a point. You are allowing the reader to elaborate their own surroundings and even their own history for the character to a degree. You give us a great skeleton, you make the skeleton dance, but allow us to flesh coat it.
I must say I love so much of your work, but your latest work has been a warm bowl oatmeal with a slight sugar to a cold tired eyed young man, who desperately needs to start his day off right. Bravo!
And again as a reader I deeply thank you!
- SCM |
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Re: A Single Flower
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 25th February 2006 @ 08:40:21 AM AEST
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| Shari, such a sad write but so deep with emotion......Mike |
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Re: A Single Flower
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Saturday, 25th February 2006 @ 04:26:01 PM AEST
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| beautifully sad Shari |
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Re: A Single Flower
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 25th February 2006 @ 06:24:25 PM AEST
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and now they can both be happy once again. lovely poem..
raquelleah |
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