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..::Untitled::.
Contributed by
antiprep32
on
Monday, 13th February 2006 @ 07:42:32 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
Holding his hand
On a hot summer day
Makes my body
Want to float away
He turns to look at me
Says "I love--" and stops
The face he made
Made my heart drop
"I can't do this,
I can't fake
So I am
Breaking up with you today."
I turn to walk home,
Tears in my eyes,
As we said,
Our last goodbyes.
Copyright ©
antiprep32
... [
2006-02-13 19:42:32]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: ..::Untitled::.
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 15th April 2007 @ 08:15:33 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| What a slap in the face! This was a very heart breaking poem. May I suggest "Faker" as a title? I hope this never happened to you. If it did, then I hope the SOB rots in hell! Great poem! |
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Re: ..::Untitled::.
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 15th April 2007 @ 11:15:11 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
"last goodbye" could be your title.
and this started out, and i thought it was going to be a love poem...but then you put that twist in it, and it's so sad!
truly heartbreaking...you're an amazing writer.
- Bethani - |
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Re: ..::Untitled::.
(User Rating: 1 )
by europeanprincess on
Monday, 23rd April 2007 @ 01:29:28 PM AEST
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a Message)
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OMG! i agree, what a twist. this was well written. thank you for sharing. as a title, i had to think and thought of perhaps,
-The Choice- i didnt want to think of something without hurting your twist. it is very good. |
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