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A Moonlit Mission
Contributed by
themonk
on
Monday, 6th February 2006 @ 07:35:58 PM in AEST
Topic:
abstract
|
A Moonlit Mission-vinnyv
The street that leads to your heart
Is paved with mysteries.
The lucid drops of dreams are dripping
On my rigid palms.
And the street lights curve like
Ribcages,
Embracing me as I stride.
The hollow houses wont possess a closet
Where I could hide.
And the silent parked cars,
Stealing glances at this wreck of me.
It makes me wonder,
Why I'm really here.
I cannot make this any harder,
For your stars are always white
And mine are forever black.
They orbit oneanother, coming so close-
So close.
And somtimes I can even feel your presence.
Yet no matter how close we are,
We never touch.
Well now the moon is resting on my skyline,
Shinning the way to your palace
In the clouds.
Inviting me to the nirvana of your essence.
But still, your just too far.
And we never touch.
I'm stranded on this street, a mere spec
In this enormous combustion.
Your simply too high above
And I'm yet to be found.
Still I will walk, hoping to fall off
This earth.
Where you can catch me,
....if you want to.
(comments please)
Copyright ©
themonk
... [
2006-02-06 19:35:58]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: A Moonlit Mission
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 6th February 2006 @ 08:07:36 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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The best debut I have read in a long, long while. If this is a taste of things to come then let me be a glutton. Excellent! Your choice of words, analogies, and your display a constant pattern of skill. I almost feel as if you were holding back slightly in this. If you were, don't. Never hold back.
A fascinating display of talent and an excellent debut!
WELCOME TO YPDC
Hope to read more, lots more!
- SCM |
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Re: A Moonlit Mission
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Monday, 6th February 2006 @ 08:55:20 PM AEST
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a Message)
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your play on words stunned me. This drew me in and kept me reading and thinking.
Vivid details and images within the lines.
I say this is a master work of art. I will be reading more!
Michelle |
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Re: A Moonlit Mission
(User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on
Tuesday, 7th February 2006 @ 12:11:57 AM AEST
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| Well done, You had me there...cold and lonely on those streets. I love a piece that gets me inside of it. Thank you for sharing. Peace to you, Laura |
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Re: A Moonlit Mission
(User Rating: 1 )
by moses on
Tuesday, 7th February 2006 @ 10:14:01 PM AEST
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whats up whats up...vinny v...ur the man and u know that. U always put everything ive done and read to shame...ur an amazing poet and dont let anyone tell u different.
keep it up,
-m-o-s |
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