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standing solemnly behind
Contributed by
SensitiveSoAbused
on
Sunday, 5th February 2006 @ 06:11:06 PM in AEST
Topic:
dedicatedpoems
|
Soft petals of a rose
Tremulous yearning and pleading,
a song of sweet desecration
and thorned memories.
Red brick stands solemnly behind
green ferns waving in a cool misty morning
Wind sings as it wraps around,
a dance of childish desperation
sweet darkness in storms
of nothing and nobody
that can be touched with a delicate light,
a rainbow on your face when you are a little girl,
sunrays on cookies when you cared
to breathe, s a crescendo of sapphire out from within your breast…
Despairing to open eyes
to see nothing.
To shiver and convulse with sobs instead of laughter two months ago.
Reach out for nothing
will hold you.
No one to discourse with,
interlude of a thousand years of wrought iron,
skin cold and hypersensitive
to the point of pain when touched
by no one.
(Hey!)
(Keep like a flower in a hurricane.)
Beautifully broken but holding on
to firmness it knows to be real,
Swirling torrents tearing
will abate; reunite with the ground.
Hot yellow sand in a desert
deserted by the moon;
(it is always there)
but how not to see only burning fiery sun?
Soft petals of a rose…
Tremulous hands on those of a red brick wall
standing securely behind.
[2006-02-05 23:57:43]
Copyright ©
SensitiveSoAbused
... [
2006-02-05 18:11:06]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: standing solemnly behind
(User Rating: 1 )
by bobotheclown on
Sunday, 5th February 2006 @ 06:43:37 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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I think that this was neither a "pooplog" nor
"*****ty". The strange thing is when I was
reading this I heard your voice and saw your
bearded face in my subconscious. The pain
in this was quite vividly expressed and I felt a
clenching in my chest.
"interlude of a thousand years of wrought iron,
skin cold and hypersensitive
to the point of pain when touched
by no one."
A wonderful description of pain there and I
liked the metaphor of "wrought iron" to
describe pain. The beginning was also
enjoyable and I saw a field of beautiful roses
and the words "sweet desecration" made me
think they had been ripped apart and
destroyed. Great poem my friend Lane good
usage of imagery and structure.
Bobo (Joel) |
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Re: standing solemnly behind
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Monday, 6th February 2006 @ 12:13:27 AM AEST
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a Message)
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WoW an outstanding, very well written and delivered piece of poetry. The imagery and flow are absolutely sensational.
I second Joel's comments. A remarkable and brilliantly penned poem. Well done and thanks so much for sharing ur wonderful work with us.
*warm hugs*
~sue~ |
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Re: standing solemnly behind
(User Rating: 1 )
by FleurdeSang on
Tuesday, 27th June 2006 @ 02:50:45 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Ah, and here you still are, hmm?
Standing securely behind.
Maravilloso, mi cielo. Como siempre, tienes tanto que decir, y lo hace tan divino. Siempre estoy sin aire, sin palabras para darte... Siempre enamorada contigo. Mas que nunca.
Savves que te quiero con todo mi alma, nenito. *Besitos para tu nariz* Hablamos horita, no, :)?
Que te pace un dia muy belleza.
Quando eternidad se termina,
~Amorsita. L&S Eterno |
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