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Need
Contributed by
mazeof_darkness
on
Saturday, 14th January 2006 @ 09:20:31 PM in AEST
Topic:
MiscPoems
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Fighting desperation, I lack all control.
Needing you, Never having you.
I don't want to let go.
Your in my mind, my heart,
I want you,
Never to be so.
Linger, wander, stay forever.
In my blood you've begun to flow.
Copyright ©
mazeof_darkness
... [
2006-01-14 21:20:31] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Need
(User Rating: 1 ) by Essentially9 on
Saturday, 14th January 2006 @ 10:21:38 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
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this was a good poem for the simple fact that you twisted a few things so that it would not be the usual overplayed crap that many writers post here. your style is a bit choppy for the rhythm and that makes you different than many writers here. your choices of words are also different than most. the subtle rhymes were a nice touch. some of this i would have changed for my own poem, but i think overall you did this justice enough, it was worth the comment. keep up the good work. |
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