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The Turning Tide
Contributed by
lostinmyself
on
Monday, 2nd January 2006 @ 10:19:23 PM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
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It's something special
The wind declared,
Not pausing to see,
If either of the two agreed...
She got caught up in his waves,
[Or maybe he just sprinkled water,
Through her hair,
And she thought it was the same.]
But she could feel the breeze...
With the tang of the salt upon her lips,
And thought she was tasting love.
She got caught up in his waves,
[Or maybe he just splashed water,
At her reflection,
To make her wash away..]
For she was the sand and he was the sea,
And from her lonely spot upon the land,
She watched the tide turn.
Copyright ©
lostinmyself
... [
2006-01-02 22:19:23] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: The Turning Tide
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Monday, 2nd January 2006 @ 10:41:06 PM AEST (User
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Aw Philly ... there is something wistful about the proverbial tide turns ... they bring with them much change.
But sometimes, [though we see it not], that can be a good thing. This piece has a very forlorn feel to it.
Like something is lost, or mayhaps wasn't there to begin with. Tough stuff to deal with, I'm sure ... and tougher
still, to bare it. I love it even more reading it now, than I did the first time. It's a raw and refreshing write from
you, hun. *calmly nodding and smiling, a "yes, I know of this kinda thing" smile*
~Breezy
(never disappointed with a Philly write)
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Re: The Turning Tide
(User Rating: 1 ) by Kie-Kie on
Monday, 2nd January 2006 @ 11:15:49 PM AEST (User
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I think it feels right to be unfinished because the story itself hasn't finished yet... you're still living it out hunni *hugs*
I'm hoping to see the conclusion piece as soon as you experience it :D lolz
This was a lovely poem sweety
Love always,
~Kiela~ |
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Re: The Turning Tide
(User Rating: 1 ) by MorningDove on
Monday, 2nd January 2006 @ 11:36:49 PM AEST (User
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Re: The Turning Tide
(User Rating: 1 ) by Nazmythian on
Tuesday, 3rd January 2006 @ 01:21:01 AM AEST (User
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Funny thing the tide ... yeah, it can wash things away ... but ya know ... you wait it out ... and you never know what it will bring back in.
I can't ... won't ... point to a single line ... they are all Phillynominously phabulous !!!
Nazzy ~
( off to fall into dreams of tomorrow ) |
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Re: The Turning Tide
(User Rating: 1 ) by fielding88 on
Tuesday, 10th January 2006 @ 05:06:08 PM AEST (User
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Very imaginative, some lines just kind of shock me due to their originality, most notably the two stanzas in italics. Vivid pictures were painted here, and I can understand the sense of it being unfinished, but personally it just seems continuous, so it would be extremely hard to truly "end" a poem such as this one. The place where you chose to end was exceptional, giving it a strong sense of that continuity and making the write that much better. Excellent write Phil :)
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Re: The Turning Tide
(User Rating: 1 ) by Willofree on
Tuesday, 10th January 2006 @ 05:15:18 PM AEST (User
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This poem makes me reflect upon the forces and power of Mother Nature. The intermingling and observing of these forces creates an awesome experience. Also, could be construed as a powerful metaphor.
Excellent piece, Philly
Will |
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Re: The Turning Tide
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 10th January 2006 @ 07:16:42 PM AEST (User
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Philly, this is such a beautiful poem! Your writing is so exquisite and flawless. I know that feeling of unfinished but could that be a feeling of hope? I hope so....to see what that tide brings in...the feeling of hope.
No matter what, your writing is excellent.
Take care,
Tim
:-)
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Re: The Turning Tide
(User Rating: 1 ) by mistifi on
Wednesday, 11th January 2006 @ 08:06:35 PM AEST (User
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this was a refreshing read. i enjoyed it :) hope to read more of your great words.
mistifi
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Re: The Turning Tide
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Monday, 16th January 2006 @ 01:43:53 PM AEST (User
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Wow!
Sad and ironic.
This peice tells so much. You have incredible insight!
...and so one day, the tide will turn back... |
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Re: The Turning Tide
(User Rating: 1 ) by darkangeleyes57 on
Wednesday, 18th January 2006 @ 02:19:02 PM AEST (User
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This was a great poem and it was well written.. I liked the flow. Great poem
christina |
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Re: The Turning Tide
(User Rating: 1 ) by boobiepeach on
Monday, 23rd January 2006 @ 06:18:37 PM AEST (User
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WOW!
I REALLY LIKE THIS. I HAS A BEAUTIFUL UNFINISHED QUALITY TO IT THAT MAKES YOU FEEL YOUR OWN OPINION WITH A VENGENCE.
THANKS
PEACH |
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Re: The Turning Tide
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 24th January 2006 @ 02:13:12 PM AEST (User
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You two have created quite a masterpiece here! Ah yes, the waves -- with no thought for the poor sand. The emotional expression is so good (and so familiar).
Definitely something to read anytime the tide comes in.
*smiles*
Blessings to both of you, and Philly I'll be seeing you soon I hope!
J. |
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Re: The Turning Tide
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Sunday, 29th January 2006 @ 05:38:22 AM AEST (User
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Wow....well, I must say you two make a great team! Nice work! |
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Re: The Turning Tide
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Sunday, 23rd April 2006 @ 05:37:55 PM AEST (User
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I was captured by the opening four lines and then fell,headlong,into this well-written poem,
Den |
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