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Don't Worry
Contributed by
frankcube
on
Monday, 2nd January 2006 @ 10:41:52 AM in AEST
Topic:
abstract
|
Ever consider who you are,
Whilst wishing upon that dreary star,
Long into that distance far,
And think about yourself one night,
To light a fire in broad daylight, and give yourself a wondrous sight,
And yet spur a moment of deep thought, that once amount to naught,
Yet now begins to fade distraught and enlighten you to ponder,
Whether your life began here or yonder,
Will your friends make you stronger?
Or is it true that loneliness be better, when for Christmas
All you get is that ugly sweater, from Aunt Yettler, down in Mettler town,
The one who goes to work in her nighting gown
That one with stripes and green all round,
Then your thoughts come to mound,
Whether life be best alone,
Or shared with friends with tea and scone
So then you stare into that flame,
Is there depth to your unhealthy blame that pushes you to desire?
And ponder deep within that fire,
Something meaningful and with power
About life and living and to tower upon your own thinking,
And step beyond the verge of drinking that last beer, that
Would easily push you to insanity
Laid with profanity, and ever so with vanity,
But then you think,
Whether life be best alone,
Or shared with friends with tea and scone
The fire burns and glows with prowess,
Then you notice your stare is endless,
The trance of flame is none relentless,
Unbreakable in its spell,
Then like the tolling of a knell,
Comes an interruption, like a spell,
But who it is, you cannot tell,
Yet you wish it would be company,
A friend or two to give you something,
For a noise be at your window,
And so you think and thus bestow,
Whether life be best alone,
Or shared with friends with tea and scone
Enter now, from the door,
Someone big, someone crawling on the floor,
One by one, they continue evermore,
More and more, each from the door,
Smiling, prancing, whistling like the shore,
Of a sunshine beach to which the birds would soar
For it’s your friends and family, be at your door,
Come to visit you, this Sunday morn’
And so you realise that yes indeed,
Life consists of friends in need,
All best shared with scones and tea
Copyright ©
frankcube
... [
2006-01-02 10:41:52]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by brew on
Monday, 2nd January 2006 @ 09:50:42 PM AEST
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Um........Lost for words, to comment by.
You summed it up, Yes, 100%.
Just .........Read it several times, and WOW.
Brew~ |
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Thursday, 5th January 2006 @ 01:07:55 AM AEST
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But then you think,
Whether life be best alone,
Or shared with friends with tea and scone
Very thought provoking write.
huggs,
emy |
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by freckle on
Thursday, 5th January 2006 @ 08:17:39 AM AEST
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Overall I think the poem is pretty good. There are a few spots where the rhyming seems forced. I enjoyed the repetitive verse.
The tone of the poem definately reminded me of Edgar Allen Poe's work.
Pretty good poem, thanks for sharing!
Carol |
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by NoSaint on
Thursday, 5th January 2006 @ 08:21:21 AM AEST
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interesting content....poses some good questions.
NS |
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 5th January 2006 @ 09:34:27 AM AEST
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[All you get is that ugly sweater, from Aunt Yettler, down in Mettler town,
The one who goes to work in her nighting gown
That one with stripes and green all round,]
This part made me smile
nice poem :) |
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jazzy on
Thursday, 5th January 2006 @ 10:43:40 AM AEST
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At first this poem made me think alot ... and not all good things , but the ending definetly gave me something good to think about...
I guess life isnt best alone , but rather shared with friends with tea and scone..LOVED IT HUNNIE...hugs and much respect ~Jazzy! |
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Thursday, 5th January 2006 @ 11:44:35 AM AEST
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I enjoyed the content and think it was good generally, but I too thought the rhyming seemed forced in some places.
Jenni |
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 5th January 2006 @ 02:44:13 PM AEST
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| you shared the most beautiful words here... and I get a feeling of the early years as well as the present, in your poem... really delights my soul, and it is written in such a way that it can benefit anyones life, such joy in your writing piece here.. RL |
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by ButchHoward on
Thursday, 5th January 2006 @ 03:09:17 PM AEST
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Interesting read. I do especially like the final 3 lines because they reveal the truth. Wordsworth said that "truth is beauty and beauty, truth and that is all one needs to know."
Butch |
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by Exodus on
Thursday, 5th January 2006 @ 05:50:09 PM AEST
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The fire burns and glows with prowess,
Then you notice your stare is endless,
The trance of flame is none relentless,
I loved this group.
Also, any use with the word spell...
Good job and keep it up. |
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by idiotbox on
Thursday, 5th January 2006 @ 11:52:19 PM AEST
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| i also agree with freckle while i was reading it i kept thinking edgar allen poe! |
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Monday, 13th February 2006 @ 03:27:32 AM AEST
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Brilliant write.
huggs,
emy |
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by Packatack on
Wednesday, 15th February 2006 @ 06:13:20 AM AEST
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| Whoa this a really good one...great write |
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by Xbxg32000 on
Wednesday, 15th February 2006 @ 03:32:39 PM AEST
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| Great job on this! You have spectacular skill with your vocabulary and structure. You could feel the turn coming while reading the entire poem, and you transisted flawlessly into the end. Amazing work, keep it up! |
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Re: Don't Worry
(User Rating: 1 )
by Caged Soul on
Sunday, 26th February 2006 @ 01:51:16 AM AEST
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I like the way you express yourself; it's very unusual, even strange, but all in a good way. The way you make use of rhyme in your poem also is very interesting.
*Note to self - read more of frankcube's work*
Unconvential & refreshing.
Ash |
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