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Toxic Essence
Contributed by
crow6279
on
Saturday, 31st December 2005 @ 02:37:51 AM in AEST
Topic:
anguished
|
Emptiness...the void is shifting
plunging upward toward the dark
Heedless of the cries for mercy...unending
my own voice makes not a sound
Visions come to bask in the wonder
a crushing blow upon the brow...unrelenting
Tepid waters erode all resistance
essence of life toxic from birth
Darkened doorways light my path of regret
a spiral staff hangs limply from my side
Marching to scenes of anguish...unyielding
emotion buried above the ground
Boulders of confusion rise to assail me
deadfalls impede regression...unmoving
Walls collapse before my transgressions
seeping wounds bear not a scar
The peal of bells springs from the masses
circling closer as they move away
Impelling and compelling...unbalanced
chained to what this life has wrought
Shunning all that comes to tempt me
broken shards under broken nails...unhidden
Falling backwards into the chasm
silent prayers neither made nor answered
Stave off the legions of sorrow beckoning
hide among the roots of pilfered dreams
Words of comfort never read...unwritten
lantern glow absorbed in wavering shadows
Crown of crushed glass now embedded
flesh so weak it tears and falls...unimpeded
Dark desires claim their rightful dominion
ground quakes with ruptured expulsions
Swallowing guilt from severed tongue
numbness consumes and sears the soul
Toxic essence sates and abates...unchallenged
until I am no more...no more
Copyright ©
crow6279
... [
2005-12-31 02:37:51]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Toxic Essence
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Saturday, 31st December 2005 @ 12:39:21 PM AEST
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a Message)
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omg this is so powerful and honest. Each word hits with a punch. Im here if you need to chat you know how to reach me.
another hug
Michelle |
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Re: Toxic Essence
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vitreous_Soul on
Saturday, 31st December 2005 @ 05:16:47 PM AEST
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a Message)
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The title grabbed my attention, so I decided to check this one out. And i'm certainly glad I did.
You do have a way with words-- descriptions such as "Boulders of confusion rise to assail me" and "Words of comfort never read...unwritten
lantern glow absorbed in wavering shadows" are very very good, and show a great understanding of diction and how to paint a visual picture.
Although the technical/structural side of the coin needs a bit of improvement (the stanzas are irregular, rhythm falters in a few parts, slightly lost focus at times), this is still an intriguing and exciting poem that I will remember for some time (and besides, the most important part of the poem, the CONTENT, is solid gold). Count me in as a fan, i'll definitely be on the look out for more of your work.
Savagely mutilated by a mental patient with a scalpel,
-V.S. |
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Re: Toxic Essence
(User Rating: 1 )
by NoSaint on
Saturday, 31st December 2005 @ 07:41:53 PM AEST
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a Message)
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time can be the enemy but many times our own self is...vivid account of an internal struggle
NS |
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