|
 Menu
|
|
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
|
Deception
Contributed by
Rakerman1999
on
Sunday, 18th December 2005 @ 02:20:40 PM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
She was only make believe
An apparition to deceive
A wisp of smoke in dark of night
A ghost that keeps just out of sight
Another voice when all alone
That speeds the heart then chills the bone
A sound you heard beyond the door
Only these and nothing more
Damn the Gods for misconceptions
Wishful thoughts and misperceptions...
Foolish wastes of precious years
Sleepless nights and countless tears
Woe, this man with lover's dreams
Future plans and hopeful schemes
Bitter waking to reveal
She was never even real
L. Carling c2005
Copyright ©
Rakerman1999
... [
2005-12-18 14:20:40]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Deception
(User Rating: 1 )
by bobotheclown on
Sunday, 18th December 2005 @ 06:25:45 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Interesting poem my friend this is good, but I
have read a lot better by you of course that
probably has to do with my whole not getting
the poem lol. It is good though don't get me
wrong and I liked the rhyming it was nice.
Bobo (Joel) |
|
|
Re: Deception
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 18th December 2005 @ 07:24:25 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| A very good poem, very beautiful. Loved what was expressed throught out it. SLipSiX. |
|
|
Re: Deception
(User Rating: 1 )
by glassicallyunsuperficial on
Sunday, 18th December 2005 @ 11:44:20 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Loved the metaphors..
cheers,
-glass |
|
|
Re: Deception
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 19th December 2005 @ 12:49:19 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Bitterness and sadness, this work wears them like a glove. I hope things get better my friend!!!
|
|
|
Re: Deception
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 25th December 2005 @ 08:28:38 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Wow, Larry! Incredible! Such a bittersweet write, for although the
essence itself is quite bereaved, it was, (as always magnificently so),
penned flawlessly.
"Damn the Gods for misconceptions
Wishful thoughts and misperceptions..."
Loved those two lines. You capture this emotion so very well.
I'm sorry you find yourself in such an unhappy place right now ...
would that I could take it all away, my friend. Your writes continue
to put a sorrowful grip on my already weakened heart.
Well done, this one Larry.
~Breezy |
|
|
Re: Deception
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Monday, 2nd January 2006 @ 01:05:33 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Boy, this one's got quite a kick to it! These four lines:
Damn the Gods for misconceptions
Wishful thoughts and misperceptions...
Foolish wastes of precious years
Sleepless nights and countless tears
... have such a fabulous pace and rhythm to them. I must of said them aloud a half dozen times.
I'm not quite sure how you managed it, Larry... but you somehow threaded the line between anger, melancholy and strength. It's really quite impressive!
~Snemmy
(who thinks she mixed up a couple metaphors there! lol)
|
|
|
Re: Deception
(User Rating: 1 )
by Spike on
Wednesday, 11th January 2006 @ 06:49:56 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Echoes of Poe in this urgent metre, I'm sure.
Fantasy sure is a powerful distraction from the empty real. A little pocket rocket of a write, Larry.
Spike |
|
|
Re: Deception
(User Rating: 1 )
by SkC_cutie on
Thursday, 23rd February 2006 @ 12:21:14 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| OmG I really like this one u.Larry! i think it is one of your top. I like the wording and the idea. You are always coming up with such good writes. *kisses |
|
|
|
· 
Poetry
Community
Members
Areas
Reference
Search
Top
Others
