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Cigarette Skin
Contributed by
Bohemian_with_a_pen
on
Tuesday, 13th December 2005 @ 02:46:49 AM in AEST
Topic:
secrets
|
Honey almond taste, cigarette skin
Heshen hair; and the eyes
Your hands directing my virgin hips
Your attention: the ultimate prize
Enthralled by the slightest glance
Feeling heavenly inside your arms
Oblivious to your silent control
Naive to your dangerous charms
But something was there, beneath it all
A ripple of constant unease
And though i played the prefect part
There was nothing i could do to please
All oxygen was squeezed from my lungs at your words
My face a bruised sky of sheer fright
Preferring to live on my own dream cloud
Drifting further, night after night
Cutting me off from the shame of the world
Longing to be saved by an affable sound
Kicking and the screaming and gasping for air
Before giving up: and deciding to drown
Copyright ©
Bohemian_with_a_pen
... [
2005-12-13 02:46:49]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Cigarette Skin
(User Rating: 1 )
by LevyMetal on
Tuesday, 13th December 2005 @ 12:24:41 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Wow, this was simply amazing.
You have great talent to discribe situations without making it seem to "over loaded".
The flow was good.
The story had a great build up.
The ending was explosive!!!
*thumbs up* |
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Re: Cigarette Skin
(User Rating: 1 )
by guiltycircles on
Saturday, 31st December 2005 @ 01:13:24 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| inexpressable talent...this went straight through me, incredible, i was drowning in your words... |
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Re: Cigarette Skin
(User Rating: 1 )
by WhyAmIHere on
Tuesday, 17th January 2006 @ 07:07:33 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Very good. I feel like the poem is making me feel those things. |
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Re: Cigarette Skin
(User Rating: 1 )
by Man_On_High on
Saturday, 25th February 2006 @ 12:04:17 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
It was the title that beckoned to me- to read
and as I read along..your inevitable consequence.
My heart bleeds for ya-
Appreciate that you've the ability to 'cope' in this way;
that is to say, the ability to pour your soul out onto paper-
I hear ya-
With Sympathy-
B |
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