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brand new love
Contributed by
jessejames
on
Wednesday, 7th December 2005 @ 10:11:17 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
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every breath i take is a long one
every beat my heart makes is a strong one
i'm loving again, never thought i could
now i'm embracing all that is good
the grass has never been so green
the skies are the blues i've ever seen
i'm finding my heart no longer afraid
no longer paying for mistakes i have made
she speaks of her love a million times a day
the most beautifull words a girl could say
i finally found a love i didn't have to steal
so i know for sure this love is real
i feel so peaceful i could fly like a dove
there is nothing in the world like brand new love
Copyright ©
jessejames
... [
2005-12-07 22:11:17] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: brand new love
(User Rating: 1 ) by Kie-Kie on
Wednesday, 7th December 2005 @ 10:34:22 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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It must be LOVELY to be feeling like that *smiles and hugs* I'm glad you're happy
Truely lovely poem :D
Love ya,
~Kiela~ |
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Re: brand new love
(User Rating: 1 ) by OzChick on
Wednesday, 7th December 2005 @ 10:57:16 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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You asked for a critique so here it is. Line six I think has a typo in it-'bluest'? Needs polishing with capitols but aside from that, simply beautiful! The last line says it all- 'there is nothing in the world like a brand new love'. Well done, this is lovely. ~Jenny~ |
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Re: brand new love
(User Rating: 1 ) by slogan on
Wednesday, 7th December 2005 @ 11:37:00 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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good job..jh |
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Re: brand new love
(User Rating: 1 ) by His_Infernal_Majesty on
Thursday, 8th December 2005 @ 05:19:09 PM AEST (User
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Nice job |
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