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Anal Violation with a 12 Inch Blade
Contributed by
ndat
on
Friday, 2nd December 2005 @ 05:51:18 AM in AEST
Topic:
abstract
|
Angle from my dreams, (putridity)
Distal; a man of extremes. (inside of me)
Anger for my disillusions, (society)
proximal to my being. (eyeing me)
(contrary)
Tissue of the morae, (encroaching)
Necrotic in malefic nature... (severing)
Encapsuled in a womb (insisting)
that is not meant to be. (freeing?)
(exonerating)
One division of unity, (misconstrue)
To force your atonement. (to ensure)
Depravation and Starvation (the dissidence)
only to feed Your gluttony. (inside of you)
(euthanasia)
Copyright ©
ndat
... [
2005-12-02 05:51:18]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Anal Violation with a 12 Inch Blade
(User Rating: 1 )
by ndat on
Friday, 2nd December 2005 @ 06:00:26 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Damn man whats with the tittle...? GROSS!! and you suck a** you can't write at all. Maybe go back to 1st grade and learn how to write coherently. The only good thing about that, is that it is short. |
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Re: Anal Violation with a 12 Inch Blade
(User Rating: 1 )
by Caged Soul on
Friday, 2nd December 2005 @ 06:39:25 AM AEST
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a Message)
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I would have liked this if it wasn't for the comment you made to your poem.
I mean, I liked the style in which you wrote this, but why did you have to dis your own poem?
Please don't submit anything else before you change your attitude towards poetry, and maybe you will be taken seriously! |
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Re: Anal Violation with a 12 Inch Blade
(User Rating: 1 )
by ndat on
Friday, 2nd December 2005 @ 06:48:27 AM AEST
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| Well judging oh how many people ussually comment on poems here compared to how many read them I thought I would pad the comments a bit to make myself look like I was getting more comments then I really was. So I decided to write a reveiw and apparently I didn't like my own poem, thus the horrible comment I gave myself... It was rather rude I might add, doesn't make one feel good about themself thats for sure. |
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Re: Anal Violation with a 12 Inch Blade
(User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on
Friday, 2nd December 2005 @ 09:18:14 PM AEST
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| Holy crap man. First of all..the title did catch my eye. With that title it's kind of hard not too. The write itself was very well done. The comments though....TRIPPY. Extremely trippy, ndat. Makes me want to go read more of your stuff. Peace |
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Re: Anal Violation with a 12 Inch Blade
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 2nd February 2006 @ 03:28:08 AM AEST
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i feel this piece was well thought out, the structure is unconventional...something i am rather fond of...the use of parenthesis is very effective... this piece is like a double edged sword...it is multi-interpretational.
I adore the obscure metaphors and symbolism. i can relate to some of these conflicting dispositions... some dark themes here, laced with convoluted notions.
i like this style, which so often instills a specific fear into a much more innocent audience.
Awe-inspiring. |
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