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the poem without a name
Contributed by
grim6669
on
Sunday, 27th November 2005 @ 03:25:16 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
my angel's bloody broken wings will never fly again
she's beaten... torn down... alone... because she sinned
i'm calling... screaming... at her above
her hate causes anger... filling her love
she tries...
then lies...
and cries...
to die...
but i beg to differ... she's still alive
alone... hiding... in the hate she's spread
deep in the nothingness... inside of her head
frantically searching to find a way
this angel will never be afraid
brave little angel... losing her mind
bleeding emotions... and falling behind
covered in torment... she'll never be freed
poor little angel just couldn't succeed
her tourniquet must be a little too loose
so she lowers her head... and tightens the noose
goodbye now my angel... i pity you none
you say, "hard times are over"...but they've just begun
Copyright ©
grim6669
... [
2005-11-27 15:25:16]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: the poem without a name
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Sunday, 27th November 2005 @ 03:43:07 PM AEST
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a Message)
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What a deep, sad and tragic write. You can feel the pain and suffering throughout ur poem. You manage to captivate ur reading into reading this sad piece from start to finish. Chin up and may u see brighter days ahead. Suicide is not the answer. May the wings of ur angel heal real quick. Sending you warm wishes on the wings of a prayer.
*tons of hugs for u*
~sue~ |
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Re: the poem without a name
(User Rating: 1 )
by Miss_Erika on
Sunday, 27th November 2005 @ 04:44:34 PM AEST
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| this is the best poem i have read on this site. i love itx5. its absolutly amazing. its definatly my favorite. forever. |
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Re: the poem without a name
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Sunday, 27th November 2005 @ 08:41:20 PM AEST
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How about 'Broken Innocence'?
I like this, the rhyme is good, as is the flow.
I think you could use some capitals, though. It would make the poem look better.
Also, the part wehere you have just one word on each line for four lines is a little... I dunno, I think you could have done that better.
Good write, anyway.
*hugs*
Phil xxx |
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Re: the poem without a name
(User Rating: 1 )
by Butterflygirl40 on
Monday, 28th November 2005 @ 02:51:49 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| wow what a nice write on this poem.. |
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