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Ashes, ashes, memory
Contributed by
In_a_While
on
Friday, 18th November 2005 @ 04:44:21 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
One more cigarette,
in ashes spell my name
In a breath I won't forget,
that poison's not to blame
One more cigarette,
on a bed of ashes made
In this heart of hate i let,
everything to grey
A pile of ashes memory,
my nest a place of two
Let the hell scream out of me,
and become what's left of you
Every scent, a line of won't,
But through this tube i grew
Every kiss, a cloud of smoke,
on a plate here left for you
To sleep... to sleep... i descend too deep.
In love I wait for hate to seep...
...slowly into me.
Copyright ©
In_a_While
... [
2005-11-18 16:44:21]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Ashes, ashes, memory
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Friday, 18th November 2005 @ 06:06:24 PM AEST
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a Message)
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To sleep... to sleep... i descend too deep.
In love I wait for hate to seep...
...slowly into me.
Dwayne a fantastic and very well composed poem you have presented us with.
The verses above I can so much relate to.
Well done it's always a pleasure to read ur great work DW. Keep it up.
*hugs*
~sue~ |
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Re: Ashes, ashes, memory
(User Rating: 1 )
by weepingprophet on
Wednesday, 23rd November 2005 @ 11:43:47 PM AEST
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It is short but brilliant. Your relationships sound strikingly similiar to the emptiness that I always seem to find. Your portrayal of emotion in this piece was so easy that it possessed a sort of lulling affect-it was wonderful-. Though it was serious and I took it to mean many things it still remains, above all, beaitiful.
Let the hell scream out of me
and become what's left of you.
This is such a passionate and vivid image-my favorite in this piece-
(my favorite write of yours so far is "for hell and her hating")
~there is a sickness far more brutal than leprosy, it ensures fatality and remains blind to its own thalidomide presence-to its victims, this sickness, is known as love-~weepingprophet
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