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I wish You Could Only Hear Me Scream
Contributed by
Sparda
on
Monday, 14th November 2005 @ 03:16:14 PM in AEST
Topic:
self-harmpoetry
|
I lie here alone, awake in this dream
I wish you could only hear me scream
They say our past we cannot hold
A way to forget, I wasn’t told
I wish I wasnt left behind
Dark thoughts cut in to my mind
I lie to my self,im not alright
I wish I had the strength to fight
The darkness keeps on cutting me
Deeper now, I begin to bleed
My blood runs thick like the dark I fear
I know by now, the end is near
My body begins to go so numb
I know the scars cannot be undone
Soon I begin to go all faint
I am leaving now, this life of hate
Now I am alone in this cold dark land
I wish you were here to hold my hand
I lie here alone, in this broken dream
I wish you could only hear me scream
Copyright ©
Sparda
... [
2005-11-14 15:16:14]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: I wish You Could Only Hear Me Scream
(User Rating: 1 )
by JenJen on
Monday, 14th November 2005 @ 04:30:08 PM AEST
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a Message)
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woweey reli gd poem, i feel so sry 4 u
jenni
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Re: I wish You Could Only Hear Me Scream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Sinfullilmissmuppet on
Monday, 14th November 2005 @ 05:27:53 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Hey,
good write
im tlkn to u as i write this
till next time
emz |
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Re: I wish You Could Only Hear Me Scream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dark_and_Cold on
Monday, 14th November 2005 @ 05:56:57 PM AEST
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Not a bad poem, but very generic, there are so many poems on this site virtually indentical to this one that there's no real motivation to read on past the first few lines.
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Re: I wish You Could Only Hear Me Scream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 14th November 2005 @ 06:40:05 PM AEST
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Great rhythm and rhyme here. Very emotive as well.
I love the way you worked the title into the beginning AND
the ending. Good write!
~Breezy |
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Re: I wish You Could Only Hear Me Scream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Gothchyk on
Monday, 14th November 2005 @ 06:43:21 PM AEST
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| i like how you said the darkness is cutting you, and how you compared your blood to the drakness that you fear, Great job. |
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Re: I wish You Could Only Hear Me Scream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 14th November 2005 @ 07:52:36 PM AEST
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Great poem, great words to lift the darkness from your soul, hang in there, brighter days are on the way... self harm is not the answer, tough it out... I know that screaming part.. feels good to let it out.. even if no one can hear any of us screaming inside...
Raquel Leah : D |
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Re: I wish You Could Only Hear Me Scream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 14th November 2005 @ 08:50:08 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Well, I read your comment on my poem, and I figured that I had some time, so why not read it right? I really like it. Its more metaphorical than mine is...I'm not a very deep person. I put everything out there. I can understand how you feel....Sometimes I feel the same way. But just know, Write it out, dont play it out. I write to relieve my pain. It wasnt a true story. Hang in there...things will get better.
Always here for anybody who needs somebody to talk to.
-Courtney
-xoxo- |
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Re: I wish You Could Only Hear Me Scream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Monday, 14th November 2005 @ 10:43:12 PM AEST
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A deep, sad and emotional write. Very well written and expressed. I like your style of writing. Well done on producing a great heartfelt write.
*hugs*
sue |
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Re: I wish You Could Only Hear Me Scream
(User Rating: 1 )
by xXxmegsxXx on
Sunday, 20th November 2005 @ 04:00:17 PM AEST
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a Message)
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i really like ur poem, its very powerful and brilliantly written.
megs
xXx |
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Re: I wish You Could Only Hear Me Scream
(User Rating: 1 )
by lilblkcat on
Sunday, 4th December 2005 @ 08:31:29 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| that was an amazing poem. i really felt your pain. |
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Re: I wish You Could Only Hear Me Scream
(User Rating: 1 )
by darkangeleyes57 on
Wednesday, 18th January 2006 @ 09:38:47 AM AEST
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I can relate. This was excellant. I felt all your words and it was just really good....
christina |
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Re: I wish You Could Only Hear Me Scream
(User Rating: 1 )
by UKRaVeN on
Wednesday, 18th January 2006 @ 04:04:39 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Haydn i told you to stop listeing to emo man!
we need to go down the pub!
nah good work man! |
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