|
 Menu
|
|
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
|
HOLLY GHOST DON'T LOATH
Contributed by
justinblue
on
Tuesday, 8th November 2005 @ 10:19:07 PM in AEST
Topic:
drugabuse
|
Exited,but uplifted the most
Gaining weight and spirit both
Off of those drugs and
And away from them thugs
Power given by the holly ghost
No longer do I loath
Copyright ©
justinblue
... [
2005-11-08 22:19:07]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: HOLLY GHOST DON'T LOATH
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Tuesday, 8th November 2005 @ 10:28:26 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| i do find this a bit inspirational, but i almost never saw it with the word error, its holy, by the way. i think that since this isnt rhyme formatted, that using rhymes forced like that actually took power away from the poem. even though the poem is short and to the point, which i like, i think that it lacked a lot of things that could make this better, i think that the inspirational value did make up for it, but other than that, i just see this as a proclamation. i think that adding more of why this is important could be useful to it. |
|
|
Re: HOLLY GHOST DON'T LOATH
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Tuesday, 8th November 2005 @ 10:52:09 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I totally agree with E9 on this one.
A little bit of alteration and this poem will be go a long way for you. Goodluck and I hope to read more of your work.
*hugs*
sue |
|
|
Re: HOLLY GHOST DON'T LOATH
(User Rating: 1 )
by wordsy on
Wednesday, 9th November 2005 @ 08:40:15 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
A truly insirational rendering.
Although the rhyming is a bit forced,
it speaks from the heart,
and this after all is the very foundation of good poetry.
Keep up the good work.
as always,
wordsy. |
|
|
|
· 
Poetry
Community
Members
Areas
Reference
Search
Top
Others
