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I'm Trying
Contributed by
BehindHazelEyes
on
Monday, 31st October 2005 @ 03:14:53 AM in AEST
Topic:
didactic
|
I'm trying to be more care free,
I'm trying to be more like the old me,
I'm trying to find the right words to say what it is I mean; but I'm always finding myself to be at a lack,
I'm trying to show a different side of me - to bring the half dead part of me back,
I'm trying to show this whole new (ok, so this old dusty) me,
I'm trying not to think of the past and the things that happened to me,
I'm better than that deep down. . . I know I am - I'm trying so hard to change for you,
I'm trying to be better not only for me; but namely for you,
I'm trying to wake up from the nightmare that has been my life,
I'm trying to open my eyes to a brand new life - I know it's a bit late to finally wake to the year 2005,
I'm trying to survive,
For you I'm trying with all my might,
I'm trying to come out of the darkness; to finally see the light,
I'm trying to bury the past; it doesn't matter anymore. . . I'm over comming it for you - I want to be a big part of your life,
I'm trying to break these self imposed restraints for you,
I'm trying to break down these walls for you - one more hit should do,
I'm trying so hard to free myself - for you,
I'm trying to be that person I should have been; the one you can always come to,
I'm just trying to be me again,
I will be me again if you allow it . . . please understand it's going to take awhile - but for you I will be what I once was - I just don't know when,
Please just know that I'm trying,
Not for me. . . but for you - I'm trying
Copyright ©
BehindHazelEyes
... [
2005-10-31 03:14:53]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: I'm Trying
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Monday, 31st October 2005 @ 05:08:22 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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Sad but well written.
Take it easy on yourself.
huggs,
emy |
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Re: I'm Trying
(User Rating: 1 )
by enigma on
Monday, 31st October 2005 @ 06:05:37 AM AEST
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a Message)
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very well expressed...really capture the distortion monkeys on your back cause...
When I first got on this poetry network, the poems trigger so many of my thoughts and memories...I responded with all I had...some three pages long...that's probably not the intent of this website...
Short version...I'm fifty-four year old...second marriage teetering...I've discovered that Loving your "Self" is not just a neat concept...
The whole time I was reading this I was hoping it was actually being directed at himself...that he was talking to himself...After all these years, I have finally gotten to the bottom of all the emotionally maiming psychological lies that kept telling me I wasn't good enough for _, _, _ and _.
Hard to keep it short...I have discovered the essential equality of man...no one is inferior...no one is superior...nothing I do or don't do can increase or decrease my worth, my value...If the perception is that I am not good enough for somebody else, it isn't coming from me...
I use to hate life...suicide prone...I have found peace and I Love life...
thanks for listening...
and triple thanks for sharing...it's kinda sad knowing there are peope out there going throught the very same tortures I went through...I Love 'em and am rooting for them....
"I'm doing this for, You."
enigma |
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Re: I'm Trying
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 31st October 2005 @ 08:04:11 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| great structure and really effective. |
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