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In My Dreams
Contributed by
Rakerman1999
on
Thursday, 27th October 2005 @ 10:07:07 PM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
Take this heart and toss it on the ground
Pain is all it knows and so it will not make a sound
Let my teardrops fall to earth unheard
They are used to loneliness and will not say a word
Fool am I to feel this way
It can never be
Kept apart by cruel fate
And the savage sea
Thinking time would kill the fire
Yet it still burns bright
Fueled by hopes and wishes that
Consume me every night...
Quietly, this soul will break in two
Torn from desperation knowing it cannot have you
Silently my tattered spirit screams
Realizing I can only love you in my dreams
Realizing I can only love you ...
In my dreams
L. Carling c2005
Copyright ©
Rakerman1999
... [
2005-10-27 22:07:07]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Thursday, 27th October 2005 @ 10:19:02 PM AEST
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Hmmm Have you been reading my thoughts?
Great to see one of my favourite poets posting again. Lovely write, tho' so sad.
Hope all is well,
Jenni |
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 27th October 2005 @ 10:19:27 PM AEST
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Incredible..........
The form and flow are perfectly natural, but more importantly the pain ...oh the pain that exists...IS this piece.
It is so intense that I hurt for you!!!!
Incredible...... |
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by ForeverAlone on
Thursday, 27th October 2005 @ 10:38:42 PM AEST
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Larry, I again must bow to your amazingness and pure heartfelt words, Truly a write to remember, Powerful, melancholly, emotion in its purest form,
Encore
~Clark
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vampirequeen on
Thursday, 27th October 2005 @ 10:45:16 PM AEST
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Incredible is right.
wow your writes always amazing. |
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by hoist1atca on
Thursday, 27th October 2005 @ 11:09:17 PM AEST
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I like this-
Love / Pain / Happiness / Dispair / Hate /
Fear / Need -
Why do they travel together?
Joe |
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Thursday, 27th October 2005 @ 11:34:20 PM AEST
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| so larry, do you have any talent to spare to us less fortunant? extremely well written. i am glad that clark referred me to this. i found your ending was power with the repetition, which you will not find me saying probably ever again. =] i also prefer rhymed poetry, and you are a master of rhymes. the concept was portrayed wonderfully, and this was a pleasure to read. as one of snemmys poems is titled, dreams really do (come true). |
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 28th October 2005 @ 02:16:35 AM AEST
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| Such a beautiful write. Kep it up! |
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Friday, 28th October 2005 @ 08:37:09 PM AEST
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WoW Larry an outstanding, sad and captivating write.
Realizing I can only love you...
In my dreams.
I can so much relate to ur poem. Hats off to you. Another masterpiece to add to your other remarkable work. well done.
*hugs*
Sue |
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by sweetangeluk on
Saturday, 29th October 2005 @ 10:45:04 AM AEST
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Roses for this outstanding write Larry. Very beautiful yet touched with much sadness.
Magnifico
((HUGS)))
Love Angelxxx |
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by Chilibear on
Saturday, 29th October 2005 @ 07:42:50 PM AEST
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Great poem, I know how you feel... Keep it up.
- Chili |
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by liquidsunshine on
Sunday, 30th October 2005 @ 02:41:33 AM AEST
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Just beautiful. This jumped at me, so poignant. I... I actually wish my heart wouldn't make a sound, my tears would go unheard, my soul would break more quietly sometimes. This is... a wonderful piece. True art.
Love and peace,
Chelsea |
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Sunday, 30th October 2005 @ 07:39:37 PM AEST
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I have to agree with the others, and with E (Essentially9) in particular... the ending is quite powerful. I can imagine the poet behinds these words silently bent over the page setting the words down... silent, until that last line. It is as if the realization come as the words did... and I have him, then, sitting up... speaking them aloud for the first time... and then setting down the pen, not so much for having finished but for being unable to.
I'd comment further about why I 'see it' that way, and about how I wish I didn't... and all that - but I've cluttered up your comment section enough already and will just sit back and hope you know that I intended only to say... this, like many of your others, moved me.
~Snemmy |
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by ever1der on
Monday, 31st October 2005 @ 11:48:49 AM AEST
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| You know what they say: " If you can't have the one you love .. then love the one you're with. I find myself having to force myself to do that. Pity that I didn't find the one I love first .. but that's how it goes. Great write by the way. |
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 6th November 2005 @ 11:16:35 AM AEST
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*wipes tear from eye*
Larry, arrestingly and inexplicably your writes move me. This, so tortured
and anguished, was, by far, the most incredibly sad piece I've witnessed.
I am like Phil, and hurt , for and with you. A heart in pain is a most vulnerable
sight. And we, as humans are untterly helpless to it's debilitating power.
How incredible it is that you can write so graciously and beautifully out
of such torment.
This, in any EVER, deserves the Roses!
*hugs and love to you*
~Breezy
(who shall never be the same after this one ... ) |
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by candysears on
Friday, 11th November 2005 @ 10:56:52 PM AEST
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| Brilliant write...In My Dreams...This is a lot better than mine...lol...I love this..God Bless! |
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Re: In My Dreams
(User Rating: 1 )
by sweetangeluk on
Sunday, 26th February 2006 @ 10:37:57 AM AEST
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Oh my this made my eyes sting Larry why did you make me cry with words so touching and sad. Felt this one from head to toe. Oh yes I know of this feeling so well my friend boy it hurts bad when the heart is crushed and all is left is memories and a face that is forever etched in ones mind.
See you in my dreams Sir Larry
Love Angelxx
Lov eAngelxxx |
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