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If..
Contributed by
xpixiexdustx
on
Tuesday, 11th October 2005 @ 09:55:44 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
If I were to slit my wrists
would I be the one to blame?
If I were to die today
would you remember my name?
If suicide was the question
and I answered it with a knife
If blood was the only memory left
would you remember me in this life?
If I didn't leave a note
and never told you goodbye
If I had never confessed my love
would you even cry?
If I were to slit my wrists
would you ever be the same?
If I were to die today
would it cause you shame?
If suicide was the question
and my answer was yes
If blood was the only memory left
would my memory be a mess?
If I didn't leave a note
would you pretend it were a lie?
If I had never confessed my love
would you question why?
If I were to slit my wrists
and returned from where I came
If I were to die today
would you be their to claim?
If I didn't leave a note
and if I didn't try
If I never confessed my love
would I really die?
Copyright ©
xpixiexdustx
... [
2005-10-11 21:55:44]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: If..
(User Rating: 1 )
by weepingprophet on
Tuesday, 11th October 2005 @ 10:00:29 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
abouding in imagery and the misery that makes it alive. Immense praise to you for this write. The growth throughout this peice was impeckable and compelling. Wondefully thought out and depicted.
~love requires being broken. Strength; requires love~weepingprophet |
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Re: If..
(User Rating: 1 )
by hoist1atca on
Tuesday, 11th October 2005 @ 10:02:44 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Very good poem-
Sometimes questions are best left without an answer-
Live on and continue to write-
I know of the pains of love-
These words have meaning to my life-
I can not forget nor can I be consumed
by the temptations that death holds for the persecuted...
Joe |
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Re: If..
(User Rating: 1 )
by weepingprophet on
Tuesday, 11th October 2005 @ 10:03:03 PM AEST
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| on a second read through i am still awed here thinking of what you presented personally, to me. What is life? the resounding question in this peice and it is stirring inside of me like a hungry infant. I am awakened again to the question that never sleeps of dies, the question of life. the question is..life? again, tremendous flow and passion pouring through this peice. |
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Re: If..
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Tuesday, 11th October 2005 @ 10:38:53 PM AEST
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|
Very emotive and dark piece. I really like that ending too. The questions you pose throughout the write is good. It's like you're interacting with the reader,
in a sense. I also like the way you switched up the lines here and there. Good job, and I hope you don't really feel this way. Take Care.
Scorp. |
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Re: If..
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 12th October 2005 @ 11:27:31 AM AEST
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| that was very good. Liked the pattern and thought provoking statements. |
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Re: If..
(User Rating: 1 )
by Bohemian_with_a_pen on
Saturday, 29th October 2005 @ 08:51:52 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| amazing write, well done |
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