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Distance and Beginnings
Contributed by
brew
on
Tuesday, 11th October 2005 @ 09:41:58 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
A new life
Anew love
One who has taken and so much more
They have given yet there is more
You have gave
You want more
You entice
But slow
Not fast, because it will lose
The looks
The openness
The soul
The thoughts
Soulness to one
They have to see
They have to know
How couldn’t they
Could they regret?
Could they sway?
How
Its inevevalant
Its there
It can’t be
To much
Copyright ©
brew
... [
2005-10-11 21:41:58]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Distance and Beginnings
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Tuesday, 11th October 2005 @ 09:49:58 PM AEST
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| I'm confused as to what you are trying to say in this poem. (I like the fish shape formed by the words) |
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Re: Distance and Beginnings
(User Rating: 1 )
by remote on
Wednesday, 12th October 2005 @ 08:12:03 AM AEST
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"You have gave" ?
Soulness ?
inevevalant?
"To much" ?
Girls where were you when you wrote this?
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Re: Distance and Beginnings
(User Rating: 1 )
by remote on
Wednesday, 12th October 2005 @ 08:12:13 AM AEST
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"You have gave" ?
Soulness ?
inevevalant?
"To much" ?
Girl where were you when you wrote this?
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Re: Distance and Beginnings
(User Rating: 1 )
by brew on
Wednesday, 12th October 2005 @ 09:30:13 AM AEST
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| Just a write, of alot of emotions, and scattered......we all do not have to make sense, all the time.do we J? It was, structured, it was just words.....But, hey, cant put in order, all the time.! Thanks for the comment anyways.! Brew~ |
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Re: Distance and Beginnings
(User Rating: 1 )
by Darkhorse71 on
Wednesday, 12th October 2005 @ 01:54:03 PM AEST
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This feels like indecision in a relationship. I think I know where you're going with this and if I'm right it pulls together nicely. It's hard to keep emotions structured on paper sometimes.
hugs
john |
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Re: Distance and Beginnings
(User Rating: 1 )
by ArsenicMyst on
Thursday, 13th October 2005 @ 12:49:15 AM AEST
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while i was reading this ...
and before i read any comments
i was wondering what is going on with this
the srtucture . the writing . the words ...
one i never heard of ...
but i got into it anyway ...
what you get out of something
often times is only based on what you yourself
put into it whether youre a reader or writer or both
frankly i cant stand the purists ...
whose expectations are that something has to be
either true to a particular idiom and construction
especially from those who are abstract themselves
using their own rules when its convenient for them
to do so, but then imposing classic standards on others.
fickle fickle fickle
confused? so what?
is it only easier to appreciate something when,
or because it has to be handed out on a silver platter
all so neatly arranged?
Brew need not defend herself ...
because the result of honest writing
either oblique or symmetric is the artist's art.
i do respect her for not only responding,
but in the way she did ... artfully and honestly
there is a saying in the classical music world,
"if you cant cry while listening to Verdi,
then you know nothing about music."
well i can tell you ive *never* wept listening to Verdi,
but i did weep freely in front of my friends watching
David Bowie and Arcade Fire playing *WAKE UP*
at the Fashion Rocks concert a few weeks ago.
sure ... they all played off key ... sang off key ...
tempos flying all over the place except on stage.
but you knew ... from the very first sounds of the intro
that something amazing was about to happen ...
and it did ...
why?
because it was honest
and thats the "sense" of it ...
and thats just how i feel about Brew's poem.
so damn the rules and full speed ahead ...
okie-dokie im off my soap box now
Arsenic·´`·:·.¸·:·´*
and i love the title too
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Re: Distance and Beginnings
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 13th October 2005 @ 09:51:28 AM AEST
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| I get the feeling you are trying to ay ,should I or should I not fall in love,,,good write ,,keep it up...Eddy |
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Re: Distance and Beginnings
(User Rating: 1 )
by Man_On_High on
Saturday, 15th October 2005 @ 02:22:02 AM AEST
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Ya don't have to make sense all the time Brew..
but spelling and grammer might help..
I can barely make sense of this Hun..
Your better than this right>??
Take a breath and write...
Yours-
Billy
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Re: Distance and Beginnings
(User Rating: 1 )
by brew on
Saturday, 15th October 2005 @ 09:52:34 AM AEST
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?????Um this was abstract.That is WHERE you jumble a bunch of WORDS together, and place on paper. What was mispelled?! This write, was not to make sense, except to my self..just a bunch of bottled emotions.words.and feelings..........as You just typed you DONT always have to make SENSE>!
Brew~ |
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