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Rust
Contributed by
In_a_While
on
Friday, 7th October 2005 @ 11:37:32 AM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Keep me on the back burner
and blacken my soul to the pan
I'm just the soup and what's left over
a taste that couldn't hold your hand
Hang me on the line to dry
i know you never cared to wear me
I'm like the moth eaten cloth of night
you let your hate be hands that tear me
Place me on the shelf to dust
and let me fade from view til noon
I'm just the blade let left to rust
you let me dull and break too soon
Now you want me back to play
like a toy not yours to own
Gimme! Gimme! Is all you say!
but this time know, i'm not at home
dw
Copyright ©
In_a_While
... [
2005-10-07 11:37:32]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Rust
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Friday, 7th October 2005 @ 11:56:44 AM AEST
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a Message)
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I heah, every word u say.
Great writing.
huggs,
emy |
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Re: Rust
(User Rating: 1 )
by weepingprophet on
Friday, 7th October 2005 @ 03:07:13 PM AEST
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a Message)
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beautiful.
~you leave but alway return, how many times must i let you go before you realize, I am Not infinite~weepingprophet |
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Re: Rust
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Friday, 7th October 2005 @ 03:45:01 PM AEST
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Dwayne, really good job with this piece! Some great comparisions, and you really expressed your feelings well.
I especially love the first stanza, and that stinging ending! Nice!!
Scorp. |
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Re: Rust
(User Rating: 1 )
by ChibiMiroku on
Saturday, 8th October 2005 @ 02:02:43 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| I enjoyed the different analogies you used. Well done! |
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Re: Rust
(User Rating: 1 )
by guiltycircles on
Saturday, 8th October 2005 @ 03:41:14 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| this is really good, well done |
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