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Rain
Contributed by
sprinter27
on
Saturday, 1st October 2005 @ 10:03:23 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
Rain, rain, fall down on me
Rain, rain, set me free
Rain, rain, fall from the sky
Rain, rain, let me cry
Clear rain, clear away this pain
Clear rain, get rid of this black rain
Clear rain, make the black go away
Clear rain, make the black leave today
Fall down on me; wash away this pain
Cleanse my body and my soul and brain
Let yourself surround me and swallow me
Let me go, let me be, and set me free
Trickle down my cheeks, down my face
Take me away; take me to my safe place
Clean my little heart, and refresh my soul
Let me once again become one whole
Rain, rain, rinse off all the bad
Rain, rain, take away my mad
Rain, rain, wipe off this frown
Rain, rain, get me off the ground
Rain, rain, fall down on me
Rain, rain, set me free
Rain, rain, fall from the sky
Rain, rain, let me cry
Copyright ©
sprinter27
... [
2005-10-01 22:03:23]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Rain
(User Rating: 1 )
by Bones on
Saturday, 1st October 2005 @ 10:41:59 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Very nice repition of the beginning. Like all your other poems, I like it, very emotional. I'm sure we'd all like the rain to wash our filthy hands sometimes in our lives. Sometimes if only to wash away the bad memories. Sometimes even the good memories, so we can't remember what we lost.
Peace,
Agent Bones
P.S.
Sorry about my absense...I'm reeeeally sorry!!!
___________________________________
I can't remember what I was trying to forget... |
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Re: Rain
(User Rating: 1 )
by Kazzy1231 on
Sunday, 2nd October 2005 @ 02:34:07 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Very good write! |
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Re: Rain
(User Rating: 1 )
by Kazzy1231 on
Sunday, 2nd October 2005 @ 02:34:37 PM AEST
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| Nice. |
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Re: Rain
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 3rd October 2005 @ 03:37:42 PM AEST
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| Another great write... the repitition is great, it makes the poem flow really well...good job...keep it up xXx |
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Re: Rain
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 3rd October 2005 @ 11:31:52 PM AEST
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| a refreshing poem, some say, do not rain on my parade.. I say, stand out in it, let it come down on you, wash, wash, wash.. be renewed... |
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Re: Rain
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Friday, 7th October 2005 @ 09:01:17 PM AEST
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This is very good your words remind me of a song called "The flood" I forget the name of the christain band that made it but it also refers to the story of Noah. I know you probably did not mean it that way but the words are striking down to the very first words of your poem which begins "Rain rain"
Graet write. |
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Re: Rain
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Saturday, 8th October 2005 @ 03:42:25 PM AEST
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*sigh* This is good. I even like the repetition, it works for the pain-filled emotions in your words. The third stanza stood out the most to me.
Very good write Sprints!
Scorp. |
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