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Led on.
Contributed by
JohnAshleigh
on
Saturday, 1st October 2005 @ 06:09:29 PM in AEST
Topic:
FamilyPoems
|
Taste.
Flavours of the salty stress,
Headaches that blank my mind.
Sight.
Watchful feelings to the eye,
Heartbeats that trail behind.
Smell.
Odours that sharpen me,
Adrenaline that blankets kind.
Hear.
Listening for my sister's call,
Treading over my lines.
Touch.
Feeling for the answers,
Straining myself trying to find.
Sense.
Calculating the means of why,
Trying to entwine.
Copyright ©
JohnAshleigh
... [
2005-10-01 18:09:29]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Led on.
(User Rating: 1 )
by kerrah681 on
Saturday, 1st October 2005 @ 09:03:08 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| So she is found , correct? I just wanted to get that straight, but man what powerful words, this poem is so sharp and clear to understand,my god I dont know what I would do if one of my kids was missing. I personally couldnot handle it, BLess you. I enjoyed the way this poem was written as well, its very visual to me the portrayal of the way everything was, felt like, seemed like and smelled like even, when your sister was missing , this is extremely well written poem, Thanks for sharing.......... I read everyones poems, but I guess my poems are "too long", so people just skip them, but in my poetry I write as if I I was ranting almost, so this poem is appealing to me, Im better at writing in kind of a just one paragraph form, but this poem has inspired me to try some new things...........GOD Bless You and Your Family. |
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Re: Led on.
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Saturday, 1st October 2005 @ 09:27:40 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| When i was younget my brither who is a special needs person ran away from home we went crazy looking for him. I am glad you found your sister. This is a dangerous world |
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Re: Led on.
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 2nd October 2005 @ 09:43:30 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Terrific title
Effective use of senses in action
Less words, gave me more information
Very clear, strong, dramatic write
I loved it.. Raquel Leah |
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Re: Led on.
(User Rating: 1 )
by bobotheclown on
Sunday, 2nd October 2005 @ 09:47:22 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Wow I can totally relate to this one as well.
My gf went missing a few days before your
sister and she's sort of been found, but
refuses to go home. Yeah this was really
hard to read, but I liked it.
Bobo (Joel) |
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