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I'm
Contributed by
spsm
on
Wednesday, 28th September 2005 @ 03:24:48 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
I知 the tear sliding down your face as you watch an angel die.
I知 the scream you keep inside you, the unanswered questions,
The why.
I知 the dark inside the closet, the eeriness of a moonless night.
I知 the flesh that you feel crawling, the eyes that have lost their sight.
I知 your shadow when your walking, your ghost when your asleep.
The dream that you are dreaming, the promise that you don稚 keep.
I知 the buzzing of a thousand thoughts, that persistent, nagging rhyme.
I知 the quiver of anticipation, which you experience from time to time.
I知 the chill that scampers down your back, the excitement of that first kiss.
I知 the thrill of seeing a shooting star, and the magic of the wish.
I知 everything and nothing, the beginning and the end.
I知 your conscience and your spirit, but never your best friend.
SPSM
Copyright ﾂｩ
spsm
... [
2005-09-28 15:24:48]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: I'm
(User Rating: 1 )
by loopylou on
Wednesday, 28th September 2005 @ 04:08:30 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| *shock horror* cant believe im the first person to comment on this1 its great! i can understand how you found it hard choosing a catogory to put it in! |
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Re: I'm
(User Rating: 1 )
by Evening_Star on
Wednesday, 28th September 2005 @ 04:22:46 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| After reading your write I just sat there stunned. It was brilliant. You are a talented writer. I look forward to reading more of your stuff. |
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Re: I'm
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Wednesday, 28th September 2005 @ 06:12:46 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Your words remind me of the song "Sad but true" by Metallica. Great words indeed. |
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Re: I'm
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Wednesday, 28th September 2005 @ 07:30:59 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I like this a lot.
I'm not usually a fan of repetition, but this works well. I love how it all matches in together and the flow is stunning.
Fantastic write.
The only think I can pint out is that you need to use 'you're' not 'your' in some places.
Great write.
*hugs*
Phil xxx |
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Re: I'm
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 28th September 2005 @ 07:31:00 PM AEST
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| I loved this poem. I'm not sure why, but it touched me in a pecular way. Thank you for sharing your mind with us all. |
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Re: I'm
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Thursday, 29th September 2005 @ 07:14:18 AM AEST
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a Message)
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A brilliantly crafted piece of poetry u have here. I love the way you've brought this across to ur reader. A real thought provoking poem. Well done and please do keep penning. I like ur style of writing.
Hugs,
Sue, Dreamer |
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Re: I'm
(User Rating: 1 )
by inoc on
Thursday, 29th September 2005 @ 08:27:21 AM AEST
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a Message)
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I'm glad you wrote this poem...
I loved every bit of it
coni |
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Re: I'm
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Sunday, 2nd October 2005 @ 01:50:55 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Well if they are jus 1/4 as good this then u must post um.
Remarkable write!
huggs,
emy |
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