|
 Menu
|
|
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
|
Deceitful You
Contributed by
hauntedscorp
on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 05:54:41 PM in AEST
Topic:
sarcasticpoetry
|
Take a moment to reflect
read my words and dissect
Find the meaning that is mine
trapping feelings you can't define
Love consumed, virtual disgrace
evidence---vanished---without a trace
A slut of emotions
please forgive the notion
Connective tissue that enwraps
the blackened heart that entraps
Convince me of intentions that you allege
charm and deceit...an alluring pledge
The hassle is not worth the crime
the view is not worth the climb
Sit down. I'll beat you to the punch
It was all a game, ( I had a hunch...)
Copyright ©
hauntedscorp
... [
2005-09-05 17:54:41]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 06:01:45 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
What a smashing piece of poetry from the talented Miss Scorp. You have a striking effect on the way u bring this across to ur reader. Love can be all the above mentioned, but it also has another side. I do hope and pray you find the love and happiness your heart truly deserves. You my friend deserve the best.
Hugs from ur fan,
Sue, Dreamer |
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 06:07:28 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Oh Scorpy...
That really hits you hard, I know.
Gosh, I know how this feels, oh, and I know how much it hurts.
You write this out so well, you can feel pain in the words, and that isn't an easy thing to do.
Great write hun, it's a shame you had to be so upset to write it..
*hugs tons and tons*
Phil xxx
(Wowed by good poetry) |
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 06:32:16 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Oh yeah! ! ! Another great Scorpenator write. I can feel the anger and definitely the sarcasim and you know how well I can relate.
TIMraider :) |
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by LoveStruck_Hippie on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 09:40:25 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Great write Scorp.
So many times I have felt this way, I never had the words to put it quite the way you did.
*hugs*
Shannon |
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 10:43:58 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Wonderful and expressive 2 the higest degree scorp, a lovely write and so filled with
deep and passionate emotional conviction, you are one of a kind . . .
(((((scorp)))))
Ben |
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 6th September 2005 @ 07:50:07 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Well now....Raw...that is how I would describe this, yes, raw...raw emotion and raw feelings (not the same)
I FEEL this piece!
Great emotive write!
(bounce...bounce.. ;) ) |
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by sprinter27 on
Tuesday, 6th September 2005 @ 12:05:47 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
ooo, scorp!! i like, i like! this was a great piece, scorp (as always), keep up the teriffic work!
~sprints |
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 6th September 2005 @ 04:05:51 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
nice expression of the condition of the heart,
An analysis of the blocked loved, dishonest from the get go.
Lies.. a love that lies to love. Love in, or of self.
Demarkating or separating love from love
destroying it before it destroys you.
Being humiliated by your own loves love
The blackened heart bears witness, no detection of red blood life in it
a very promiscuous heart studying its inner cells
luring itself to love love, and no proof of proving that is does or is..a magic spell is cast deceiving at it best
Some sort of insecurity contract set up here,
Sort of like a fight or flight, emotional field
*****Sit down. I'll beat you to the punch
It was all a game, ( I had a hunch...)
bailing out before its too late.. throwing or putting to the side...
Well, you drew me into this one lol..
Raquel Leah
|
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 6th September 2005 @ 05:51:16 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| great poem. lies and deceit that's life baby. thank you for the nice comment. I look forword to reading more of your work. |
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by Willofree on
Tuesday, 6th September 2005 @ 07:54:56 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Very candid and to t he point. A very thought provoking write, which demonstrates that the emotion love can be very fickle and unreliable at times. I especially liked the last stanza.
Powerful write, Scorp
Will |
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by Pisces101 on
Wednesday, 7th September 2005 @ 05:39:04 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
"a slut of emotions" great job scorp. that put a smile on my face (even though i'm sure thats not what you were intending to do.) i can relate .nice job
sarah |
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Thursday, 8th September 2005 @ 01:29:01 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| This is good. You have a way of getting to the point quickly. Your poem shows honesty and depth. |
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by Lionel on
Wednesday, 26th October 2005 @ 02:57:19 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I've just read 6 or 7 of your poems. You have good poetic ability. Could you write a few happy one's? I know you have things to be thankful for. Right?
God bless |
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by DamentedSuicide on
Sunday, 4th December 2005 @ 05:35:10 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| This is a really good write i liked it alot love the style |
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 26th March 2007 @ 10:06:32 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Don't mince words scorpy .. tell us how you really feel!
lol
Seriously girl, this was outstandingl!! I especially loved,
"A slut of emotions" what a way to describe them!!
You have captured the pain of being deceived by your
very own passion .. but is it a deception really? I mean,
we feel .. and we should never be shamed into thinking
that this is wrong, you know?
EXCEPTIONAL piece, hun. RAW, unbridled passion ~
~Breezy |
|
|
Re: Deceitful You
(User Rating: 1 )
by JamesStockdale on
Tuesday, 8th February 2022 @ 07:44:43 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Wonderful poem indeed.
Love the ending.
It had a smooth urgent flow to it.
|
|
|
|
· 
Poetry
Community
Members
Areas
Reference
Search
Top
Others
