|
Menu
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
Contrition
Contributed by
Man_On_High
on
Sunday, 4th September 2005 @ 12:55:32 AM in AEST
Topic:
SadPoetry
|
I am sad as the morning begins,
for the sudden Death of simple Life.
I once imagined I was born for
lying deflowered, upon the high
and orderly alter of ambition,
before it had a chance at virginity.
Sad too, in a remote metaphysical way,
for the way things were..
reeking of promise and an ambitious fever-
all that hope and promise
and murderous dedication,
eternities of still, walking feet, marching..
pounding out miracles
and sucking the soul away.
I am sad for being on last night,
wasting the nocturnal virtues of something better
and not remembering a moment of it;
and sadder still for writing now
with all my grief and greed..
throwing stones at myself,
a stationary target
that has brought but its own pain..
not once hitting the mark
in extravagant excess of contrition.
I am already sorry for what I wrote,
sorry in a vengeance as it were;
in today for want of somewhere else to exile my pain.
I saw the tide come in late
and felt sad for the things of sea and waves..
lurching with drunkeness on the jagged rocks
and from a place of close prosperity.
B
Copyright ©
Man_On_High
... [
2005-09-04 00:55:32] (Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment. That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Contrition
(User Rating: 1 ) by MorningDove on
Sunday, 4th September 2005 @ 10:26:14 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
To repent a sin; to make an act of contrition in good faith to your maker. Excellent write. Good faith, hmmm, does that exist anymore or is it lip service like most words used in this world. Powerful write.
Rita |
|
|
Re: Contrition
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Sunday, 4th September 2005 @ 10:40:20 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Powerful,Powerful stuff man. I enjoyed every sentence of it. I totally understand your vision.
Check out some of my work if you like. Best regards Sadman. |
|
|
Re: Contrition
(User Rating: 1 ) by Silent-No-More on
Sunday, 4th September 2005 @ 12:11:31 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
This is terribly potent. It echos in the core of me in the very way that choked back tears seem to reverberate there. That you wrote of it, is not something that you should feel at all badly about - not, Billy, when you do so in such a poignant and profound manner as you have done here. To have not put it on the page would have been a far worse thing... this, I know.
I have to tell you, Billy - (while not knowing at all if you'd have any sort of appetite for doing so) - I would so love to find a post by you in the "Poetry Readings" forum, indicating that you had created a blog and shared a link for us to hear you read this. Yes... I would like that very much.
Incredibly moved and seriously impressed by what I found here,
~Snemmy
|
|
|
Re: Contrition
(User Rating: 1 ) by gwenevere on
Sunday, 4th September 2005 @ 03:57:54 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
You write what you feel at the time and should not be sorry.Getting rid of feelings on paper is good for the soul.No time for throwing stones,just write some more, Ros |
|
|
Re: Contrition
(User Rating: 1 ) by DemonProdigy on
Sunday, 4th September 2005 @ 05:34:00 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Very dark and grim. I love your use of intricate detail through out. Lovely work overall. |
|
|
Re: Contrition
(User Rating: 1 ) by brew on
Sunday, 4th September 2005 @ 07:25:50 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Well we all can write, what others may want to see.........Yet to write what you know they do see, and they use to feel ...........is something that ones mind should always contaplate and make sure it is the truth.! Very inner and thinking write you have.......We can stretch a tad.......and bend a lil, but it will hit you back in the face somehow.! Always, a write to ponder on . Thanks for the honest post
Brew~ |
|
|
Re: Contrition
(User Rating: 1 ) by Eternal_Dreamer on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 01:07:27 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
An honest and truthful write by one who can clearly express himself deeply and openly. You should not be sorry for pouring out your emotions. By writing about it helps alot. May things brighten up for you. To repent is not a sin my friend, it helps the heart heal from it's wounds.
An exceptional piece of poetry from a talented and gifted writer.
Much peace to u my friend.
Hugs,
Dreamer |
|
|
Re: Contrition
(User Rating: 1 ) by pUnKa_RaCh on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 11:02:12 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Billy through this write I can feel and almost envision your sadness...
Honest write my friend. In fact I'm unsure of what to say because your words feel as if they are mine.
One of the saddest I've read from you, be strong. |
|
|
Re: Contrition
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 11:25:17 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
A true master peice of litterature, " I'm, already sorry for what i wrote " you know what
my friend, i dare say say Mark Twain couldn' t have put it better . . .
Ben |
|
|
Re: Contrition
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Monday, 12th September 2005 @ 06:21:56 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Hello Billy:
We all have moral shortcomings sir, that is laced with grief or unhappiness at times. Yes it makes us pretty normal as sometimes it does tend to deprive us of our virginity, the prime beauty of our soul.
The strong power that we hold deep inside of us seems to leave us, so we can always resort to the perceptible senses beyond our reality, which at times gives us a strong impression of some element of truth, which some people can view as a lie. But that is what holds us together. Knowing the mortal agony of death comes to each and everyone of us, we exert ourselves, become hurried and feel empty, all used up by ourself and others. Sometimes I get that way, I am active in the night with dreams and bring them to daylight, pelting my brain with stones of dull somber colors, sometimes going for hours in a day not fully remembering, because of emotional pain. But, in each of us, we have that desire, that successful thriving nature to keep going on. So cheer up, life is just a blink, a wink away from the eternal joy of bliss.
Raquel Leah :D
|
|
|
Re: Contrition
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Monday, 1st January 2007 @ 06:29:29 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Sweetest; how cruel we are, waging wars with ourselves; banishing
our emotion instead of embracing it- however sad ..
But holy WOW! How you have captured and excuted your sadness
so brilliantly within these words.
I know it's easy for me to say, and perhaps even annoyingly trite,
but even in down times and harrowed sadness, there remains
an everpresent hope. We KNOW change is inevitable- remember
that, when things turn bleak.
Love,
~Breezy
XoX |
|
|
|