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Rejecting Dreamlessness
Contributed by
Silent-No-More
on
Saturday, 3rd September 2005 @ 05:38:17 PM in AEST
Topic:
Lifepoems
|
Oh -
I have been to that dreamless place
I wallowed there, in hopelessness
Until I let myself begin to believe
That only in giving up…
Would I be free
Then…
I learned what darkness can become
Closed my eyes with each setting sun
But rejected the possibility of a dream
That it could ever be
What it had seemed
But sometime between that time and this
I remembered what it is to wish
I found undreamt dreams too much to bear
And decided no longer
Could I stay there.
Now I stand before you
And I declare
Never again will you find me there
For that dreamless place, born of fear
Simply can’t compare… to here
And now… here
I can live with dreams unfulfilled
And wishes that I’m wishing still
‘Cause I know with certainty that one’s heart
Cannot live long there within the dark
And I refuse to let it die
So I must dare, at least, to try
So I close my eyes… to dream again
Believe in “someday” and care not when
The dreams I dream might be resolved
I’ll just be content to have dreamt at all
For I learned that just by wishing long
I have what I’ve wanted all along
I have possibility and I have hope
And that… is what I needed most.
Copyright ©
Silent-No-More
... [
2005-09-03 17:38:17]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Rejecting Dreamlessness
(User Rating: 1 )
by gary on
Saturday, 3rd September 2005 @ 05:55:44 PM AEST
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I loved it you can rhyme with the new one maybe change the name for the baby of Rejecting Dreamlessness.
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Re: Rejecting Dreamlessness
(User Rating: 1 )
by trini on
Saturday, 3rd September 2005 @ 06:24:46 PM AEST
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no, i think that the rhyming worked very well with this piece. it wasn't overworked. the ending may need a little rephrasing [for clarity that is], but overall a very nice write. keep it up.
-trini |
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Re: Rejecting Dreamlessness
(User Rating: 1 )
by holderofthestone on
Saturday, 3rd September 2005 @ 07:41:29 PM AEST
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oh silent.... amazing...
"The dreams I dream might be resolved
I’ll just be content to have dreamt at all"
-- these two lines stood out to me. we've spoken many a day about tthings like this... and these 2 lines have summed it up beatifuly. sometimes its not the desination, its the journey.... You always have a way with your words. this poem is Wonderful! I loved it!!!! A+++++
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Re: Rejecting Dreamlessness
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Saturday, 3rd September 2005 @ 09:02:05 PM AEST
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I don't find this overworked at all Snemmy...I rather like the thought and rhyme put into this...Call me crazy, but...
Is this in any way related to writer's block?? Oh, I love your usage of italics too: )
Scorp.
(Wonders how crazy she sounds, thinking it's about having writer's block :O ) |
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Re: Rejecting Dreamlessness
(User Rating: 1 )
by Man_On_High on
Saturday, 3rd September 2005 @ 11:40:08 PM AEST
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It's brilliant..it's cast out,
deep in thought..surreal..as dreams can be..
But-
..putting the rhyme aside..(as yours is subtle
and unassuming here)
I would see fit to paying a bit more attention to
puncuation...italics and the like..
..perhaps some bold text here and about..
..something as deep, cannot survive on grammer alone-
but will anyway..
(save for the diction)
very well written..
I loved it-
Yours-
B
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Re: Rejecting Dreamlessness
(User Rating: 1 )
by MorningDove on
Sunday, 4th September 2005 @ 12:36:55 AM AEST
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Excellent post, Snemmy. Hope is what gives us the strength and patience to wait on our 'tomorrow'.
Rita |
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Re: Rejecting Dreamlessness
(User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on
Sunday, 4th September 2005 @ 09:40:10 AM AEST
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Snemypoo, this was not over done at all. I think it's quiet lovely. And as for the rhymes, i like the way you ended each stanza.
So I close my eyes… to dream again
Believe in “someday” and care not when
The dreams I dream might be resolved
I’ll just be content to have dreamt at all
For I learned that just by wishing long
I have what I’ve wanted all along
I have possibility and I have hope
And that… is what I needed most.
I love that part *sighs*
Jane~ |
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Re: Rejecting Dreamlessness
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 03:28:32 AM AEST
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Writers block? This is an excellent piece of poetry. I loved the way you've brought it across to ur reader. You're a truly talented poetess who has such flare with a pen.
Hugs,
Sue, Dreamer |
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Re: Rejecting Dreamlessness
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 6th September 2005 @ 08:09:27 AM AEST
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I have to say it certainly does NOT seem forced.
I will say this though....
You may yet not be where you want to be, but you are definatey better off than you were. The possibilities now are endless. |
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Re: Rejecting Dreamlessness
(User Rating: 1 )
by Destined_for_this on
Tuesday, 6th September 2005 @ 09:31:26 AM AEST
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| First off, thank you very much for your comments! You really made that peice feel worth while. Second, wow this is very well written. It grabbed my attention from the start. I feel what you wrote, and presently am going through a bit of it myself. I am happy to see that a writer with skills such as yours, has encouraging comments for myself. Thank you, keep writing. |
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Re: Rejecting Dreamlessness
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 9th September 2005 @ 02:25:54 PM AEST
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Possibility, and Hope ... i think they breed patience, and some dreams i think you have to, or maybe need to wait for. Maybe we just aren't yet ready for them yet. That doesn't mean we should stop dreaming. it seems as though you learned that and this is how you expressed it. i don't see fluff, i see fullfillment.
D.Sapelo |
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Re: Rejecting Dreamlessness
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 30th September 2005 @ 07:52:04 PM AEST
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Ah yes, Snemmy this is lovely. What a treat to read your poetry. This
spoke to me loud and clear, for I think I have been there too...
fluff? I daresay not! Profound, engaging, innovative, but fluffy?
NEVER!! I am again reminded why I love your poetry so!
Wonderful write.
*huggles*
~Breezy
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Re: Rejecting Dreamlessness
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 18th June 2006 @ 12:28:26 AM AEST
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| Fluff....? Pfffgghhttt!!!! No way. A masterpiece of self doubt turning into wonderful optimism. Yes. |
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Re: Rejecting Dreamlessness
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 18th June 2006 @ 12:30:24 AM AEST
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| Oops, and forgot to type I love that title. Yep, love the poem too but also gotta love the title! |
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