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..cosily beside me-
Contributed by
Man_On_High
on
Saturday, 3rd September 2005 @ 01:32:22 AM in AEST
Topic:
DreamsandWishes
|
She sat there, cosily beside me
twirling the stem of glass in her fingers
hip against mine in the small booth
in out of the December fog and frost
icy streets and rooftops of cars parked outside
We sat hip-touching cosily dreamily drinking
in the merry-making midst of a local pub
bricklayers carpenters truck drivers
and men of 'praiseworthy' unemployment
downing amber skirted cream topped pints of stout
like avaricious fish...to the gills))))
high in a current of men talking 'bout women
men with grown-up daughters discusing with phallic symbolisim
the attributes of grown-up daughters of other men
a geyser of more than rated "R" jokes
flung with repetitive talent into the smokey air
True men one and all hunched at the Highland House
in a varied attitude of eloquence..lol
becoming less and less...slurred with beer
on a sloping shoulder and half moon face
squinted in comic disbelief..hand slapping a leather thigh
late night bedroom intimacies from behind
hand concealed mouths..heads nodding in kind
for now she sat cosily there beside me
twirling the stem of glass in prayer-like hands
hip against mine in a small booth
till last call when I realized
we hadn't said a word.
M.O.H.
Copyright ©
Man_On_High
... [
2005-09-03 01:32:22]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: ..cosily beside me-
(User Rating: 1 )
by brew on
Saturday, 3rd September 2005 @ 01:45:53 AM AEST
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Hmmmm..seems words were not needed, as it was already were it was going, and had been all along........you dont always need words.........it can be with eyes.......feel....touch..and the simple glance.! Very , Very......subtle, and sensual writing.!
Brew~ |
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Re: ..cosily beside me-
(User Rating: 1 )
by gwenevere on
Saturday, 3rd September 2005 @ 11:08:28 AM AEST
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| Not a word was uttered and not a word was needed.Silence said it all.Another great write, Ros |
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Re: ..cosily beside me-
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vampirequeen on
Saturday, 3rd September 2005 @ 01:11:43 PM AEST
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wow i am impress.......
love and hugs |
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Re: ..cosily beside me-
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 3rd September 2005 @ 05:28:26 PM AEST
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Beautiful write bill lovely expressions and flow of emotions great ending . . .
Ben |
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Re: ..cosily beside me-
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Saturday, 3rd September 2005 @ 09:07:29 PM AEST
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I like the perfectly placed 'lol' most...lol ; )
Good job with the imagery and story telling! I felt like I was right there...vivid...Ahhh the days of bar hopping....*eye roll* Thanks for the reminder :O
Scorp. |
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Re: ..cosily beside me-
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Sunday, 4th September 2005 @ 01:17:21 AM AEST
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Vivid descriptiveness, along with a pointed but subtle ability to ctitique. Something I have noted before now in your style.
Maybe visit Starbucks next time?
Slàinte.
Andrew |
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Re: ..cosily beside me-
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 12:58:11 AM AEST
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Billy a sensational piece of poetry filled with great imagery and story telling. I loved the way you've bought this across to ur reader.
No words were needed. For silence said it all.
An exceptional piece from a talented poet like yourself.
Hugs,
Dreamer |
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Re: ..cosily beside me-
(User Rating: 1 )
by MorningDove on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 01:48:00 AM AEST
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| Sometimes words break the spell. Just being within someone's aura is enough said. I find this to be quite beautifully erotic in a strange way. The vibrations passing from one another, the slightly movement being felt and just looking occasionally into the eyes can be more erotic than any word could ever be. People place too much importance into verbal interchange. Beautiful post, Billy. |
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Re: ..cosily beside me-
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 06:04:32 PM AEST
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*****in a varied attitude of eloquence..lol
I had to laugh with you here.. LOL LOL
Cozy is right.. I enjoyed this. One giant picture.
Yes, I do know a little about a place such as that.
Excellent write, you expressed the scene of both characters well, as you did what was around you, and outside.
twirling the stem of glass in her fingers
so visible..
Yes, this poem did give me some type of clue
that neither one was speaking, just enjoying the resting, closeness and the surroundings, that filled the void.. after a long time noticing no one spoked
*****hip against mine in a small booth
till last call when I realized
we hadn't said a word.
proved my reading correct as I got to the end.
Lovely material.. beautiful cozy write.. ta daaaa!!!!
Ok, coffee break is over, everybody back on their heads lol lol.
Raquel Leah
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Re: ..cosily beside me-
(User Rating: 1 )
by pUnKa_RaCh on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 10:58:54 PM AEST
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wow...you seem to be able to write about ANYTHING with poised brilliance!!!
I love it...especially the beginning...such gentle words.
You have such a powerful presence when writing! |
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Re: ..cosily beside me-
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 20th September 2005 @ 08:43:24 PM AEST
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I agree with Ben. Great ending. :~)
This line made me laugh because it is SO true! (Whether
we like it or not, and maybe it wasn't meant to be funny.... lol)
men with grown-up daughters discusing with phallic symbolisim
the attributes of grown-up daughters of other men
Love the poem Billy! L-O-V-E, loved it!!!!!!!!!!!
~Breezy
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Re: ..cosily beside me-
(User Rating: 1 )
by jyssvw22 on
Sunday, 16th October 2005 @ 12:16:30 PM AEST
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this was a fantastic write, I felt like I was in the booth too, of course our hips were not touching at all...lol…I know the type of drunks you are describing, they speak..and you feel embarrassed to think they are human like you…she must have something..to sit there and not say a word…..wonderful story…..
my favorite lines are…
in a varied attitude of eloquence..lol
becoming less and less...slurred with beer
and of course the strong ending..
hip against mine in a small booth
till last call when I realized
we hadn't said a word.
Nice work here..MOH at his finest
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