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Noctural Desires
Contributed by
naturegirl
on
Tuesday, 30th August 2005 @ 07:35:03 AM in AEST
Topic:
anguished
|
He masquerades on the edge of darkness
as his shadow beckons my very existence
meeting upon the same path was fate
his eyes as black as the night piercing my soul
The tenderness as he caresses me deceives me
with the warmth of blood flowing from his savage bite
I become his in the night,wanting more and more I succumb
eternal pleasure replaces my loneliness, my hunger for love
The thirst for love is replaced by pleasures of the darkness
only found within a world without sunlight
I will continue my search for pleasure in the moonlight
the thrill of desire and the kill create a chilling excitement
Penetrating my soul beyond sexual desires of my forgotten life
a life where angels guarded my soul from my nightmares
drained of blood and innocence, my flesh whiter then pale
my existence consists of nocturnal desires and deception
My days now spent in blackness and loneliness
twilight awakens me to hide in shadows of illusion
the beauty of love replaced by a desire to live for eternity
there was a better way to find it, but it has eluded me
Copyright ©
naturegirl
... [
2005-08-30 07:35:03]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Noctural Desires
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dreama on
Tuesday, 30th August 2005 @ 09:34:52 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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nice poem :)
good imagery and nice use of the theme of replacement of love with desire!
keep em up :D
Pete |
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Re: Noctural Desires
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 30th August 2005 @ 05:13:48 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Hmn. This is largely abstraction;
He masquerades on the edge of darkness
Who is he? Why is it dark? Is it a room, or a forest or the reaches of torchlight?
If you can describe more of what you're trying to say in less words, and more profound images, then you'll be on the right track.
As it stands, this effort lacks the punch you wanted to give because it is too long, in my opinion.
Keep writing,
N_F |
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Re: Noctural Desires
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dralion on
Wednesday, 31st August 2005 @ 11:40:00 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Is this supposed to be about a vampire?
Are you trying to compare something to a vampire? |
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