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You can't put out the fire
Contributed by
Ineedanap
on
Tuesday, 30th August 2005 @ 01:57:00 AM in AEST
Topic:
abstract
|
This hollow heart can't beat alone
Beside a soul gone cold
And through the war of memories
Leaves just one story untold
The life and love of which i choose
Or which i seem to seek
Borded by the black unknown
A truth buried so deep
And through the pain i suffer
Grown to become so cerulean
Yet through the love i offer
I have yet to recieve a thing
The trust in which i lay in you
Seems to dissapear
Evaporate into the skies
Leaving everything to fear
For now i have;
As i always seemed to be
An abandoned young soul
Longing to be free
So ask of what you want of me
And take of what you desire
But as the sun sets behind the trees
You know you can't put out the fire
Copyright ©
Ineedanap
... [
2005-08-30 01:57:00]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: You can't put out the fire
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Tuesday, 30th August 2005 @ 03:35:38 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Very well written. I can certainly relate to this.
huggs,
emy |
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Re: You can't put out the fire
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Tuesday, 30th August 2005 @ 10:48:14 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Certainly sounds like love to me: )
Good job with this piece. It had a pretty steady flow to it, and your thoughts were well conveyed.
Scorp. |
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Re: You can't put out the fire
(User Rating: 1 )
by secretwind on
Tuesday, 30th August 2005 @ 11:10:40 AM AEST
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a Message)
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well done
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Re: You can't put out the fire
(User Rating: 1 )
by hunterj2k on
Wednesday, 31st August 2005 @ 01:13:45 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| I love your rhyme scheme! It flows nicely! |
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Re: You can't put out the fire
(User Rating: 1 )
by Maxximus on
Thursday, 1st September 2005 @ 10:04:20 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Nice flow... good use of diction- overall good stuff. I'm sure most of us can relate over some lost love- something taken from our lives but leaving an impact. Keep it up |
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Re: You can't put out the fire
(User Rating: 1 )
by ChibiMiroku on
Saturday, 29th October 2005 @ 02:56:31 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Cerulean wasn't a word that I'm used to seeing, but all the same, it seemed to fit in right where it was. Awesome vocabulary! |
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