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Season of Change
Contributed by
hauntedscorp
on
Saturday, 27th August 2005 @ 01:00:28 AM in AEST
Topic:
ambiguous
|
Splattered reflections upon the page
unkempt thoughts now disengage
Burden of life weighs heavily again
feelings uncomposed flow through my pen
Leaps and bounds, not a mile from the start
severance of ties, but not from the heart
Monotony; all too happy to strum along
listen to the same beat of the very same song
Quiet contradiction in all that you speak
looking past the solution to all that you seek
Truth laces all that's left unspoken
harbour a bond not meant to be broken
The ride uphill is fast, not slow
but once we arrive, we'll cruise---plateau
Seize the moment while others choke on it
attainment is yours, but you must commit
Stroke of genius by destiny's hand
the seeds have been sown, now let's expand
Copyright ©
hauntedscorp
... [
2005-08-27 01:00:28]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by fielding88 on
Saturday, 27th August 2005 @ 01:24:14 AM AEST
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| Bravo! I love your attention to rhyme scheme in this write, and that last stanza in partiuclar flows brilliantly. I loved the first two lines of it in particular, and how you used plateau. it was just such a nice feeling as you read it..lol call me weird. and your last line of the first stanza seemed quite philosophical too. Impressive piece scorp! |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Saturday, 27th August 2005 @ 03:07:20 AM AEST
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| Great poem. You have a great writing style, pure and simple the flow of your words was great. |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Shattered_soul on
Saturday, 27th August 2005 @ 04:54:27 AM AEST
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Ooh... very to the point, and the rhythem was very script written. I liked it, I think I may have only read a few of yours but what Ive read Ive liked.
Em |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by DrogedaRain on
Saturday, 27th August 2005 @ 12:49:05 PM AEST
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| Very nice~! Good imagery to say the least. Look forward to reading more of your writes. |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 27th August 2005 @ 04:20:00 PM AEST
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*****Splattered reflections upon the page
unkempt thoughts now disengage
Burden of life weighs heavily again
feelings uncomposed flow through my pen
Leaps and bounds, not a mile from the start
severance of ties, but not from the heart
Oh yes, uncertainty at its best, the heart ignoring the pen for a more clear mind write. The senses are going through withdraw.
*****Monotony; all too happy to strum along
listen to the same beat of the very same song
Quiet contradiction in all that you speak
looking past the solution to all that you seek
Truth laces all that's left unspoken
harbour a bond not meant to be broken
A lot of times one sentence can complete the entire poem. Some times a single word.
*****The ride uphill is fast, not slow
but once we arrive, we'll cruise---plateau
Seize the moment while others choke on it
attainment is yours, but you must commit
Stroke of genius by destiny's hand
the seeds have been sown, now let's expand
Yes, and so we continue to finish what we set out to do, even if it is written and read with the same unvarying tone, the same pitch, same energy, same force of feelings.
Your poem is ambiguous alright. Of course, yes, there is truly double meanings in this write. Wonderful to exercise the mind when reading.
Raquel Leah : D |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 27th August 2005 @ 04:20:41 PM AEST
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| Nice title to go with..RL |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 27th August 2005 @ 04:25:16 PM AEST
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hmmmm scorp....I like this.
It does leave much to ponder and allows the reader their own interpitation.
It semms fraught with change, warnings and yet hope of success.
Nicely put scorppy.... |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 27th August 2005 @ 05:27:59 PM AEST
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this is strong and and very penitrating i felt this right to the core, not only great writting but very effective . . .
((((scorp))))
Ben |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on
Saturday, 27th August 2005 @ 10:00:23 PM AEST
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| Hey Scorp, very enjoyable read indeed. From it I recieved feelings of change and hope. Renewal..... the beginnings of something grand. Peace to you, Laura |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by sprinter27 on
Saturday, 27th August 2005 @ 10:34:26 PM AEST
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a great poem by one of my fav. poets! great write, scorp, i loved it as i loved all yours. great job, keep up the great work!
~sprints |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Monday, 29th August 2005 @ 11:11:30 AM AEST
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Very good write.
Deep.
huggs,
emy |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Willofree on
Monday, 29th August 2005 @ 02:07:00 PM AEST
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Perhaps a struggle for progress and achievement. A difficullt struggle, but one that is attained. I really like the rhyme, structure and flow of the poem. The imagery is great, along with the way you put the words together... wonderful style
Well done, Scorp
Will |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 30th August 2005 @ 12:05:07 PM AEST
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| Wow! awesome!!! don't know what else to say...soooooo wow! awesome! |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by In_a_while on
Friday, 2nd September 2005 @ 04:17:01 PM AEST
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very, very well written. The pace of the poem was very mellow and allowed enough time, and rhyme to take it all in. I especially fell in love with:
Monotony; all too happy to strum along
listen to the same beat of the very same song
it's so easy to get into that state of mind isn't it? Well, it's a great write and i hope to read much more of your work again!
Take Care!!
Dwayne |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Man_On_High on
Friday, 2nd September 2005 @ 08:05:04 PM AEST
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well written Scorp,
and with great "time"
I love the lines..
"The ride uphill is fast, not slow
but once we arrive, we'll cruise---plateau"
It's truly a pleasure everytime Scorp,
to read your work.
B
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by Mangos on
Sunday, 4th September 2005 @ 10:36:15 AM AEST
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Scorp this write was deep. I felt that it conveyed a lot of truths wrapped in despair. I’m not sure exactly what it is about but it sounds like something good has gone bad. I love these lines…The ride uphill is fast, not slow
but once we arrive, we'll cruise……They ring so true and real with me.
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by seci on
Friday, 16th September 2005 @ 04:47:06 PM AEST
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| i love your poem. i can't wait but i want to write so much like you. i don't know who u are but i admire you and your writing. |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Friday, 7th November 2014 @ 05:12:02 PM AEST
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seems to have several different meanings, a hint of romance yet
seems like a quiet personal reflection, also looking beyond the
obvious, very well written to capture much intrigue, it's beautiful,
hugs n' love nessa |
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Re: Season of Change
(User Rating: 1 )
by JamesStockdale on
Tuesday, 13th December 2016 @ 09:13:11 AM AEST
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Wonderful flow and you can read it so fast and not stumble.
A brilliant poem and message!
James |
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