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unknown problem
Contributed by
cutestmofo
on
Thursday, 18th August 2005 @ 06:22:35 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
All alone
Every time I close my eyes
All I see is my demise
A place of darkness and torment
A crimson filled moment
Light flickers above my tormented body
My shadow laughs at my worry
I am in a room of whispers and fear
I am not afraid but I still shed a tear
I look up and wonder why
Why I fail and yet I try
Falling slowly into despair
I cry for help but they do not care
My room is closing on me
But no one can see
As the walls come closer and closer
I hear a distorted figure’s laughter
My lungs tightens my breath shortens
My heart shrinks and my life rottens
My heart beats like the sound of thunder
I sit back and wonder
I’m I asleep no it cannot be
Am I depressed no this isn’t me
Is my problem truly unknown
No this is what I feel when I’m alone
By Kerwin Etienne
Copyright ©
cutestmofo
... [
2005-08-18 18:22:35]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: unknown problem
(User Rating: 1 )
by MorningDove on
Thursday, 18th August 2005 @ 06:33:11 PM AEST
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You do dark very well. I must say I do prefer your brighter writes. I write dark occasionally, but not often. You are a tremendous talent as you can do many venues. Keep penning my friend.
Rita |
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Re: unknown problem
(User Rating: 1 )
by xthrewmyluvawayx on
Thursday, 18th August 2005 @ 06:44:34 PM AEST
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i can relate sooo well to this poem...
awesome job...
keep it up!!! |
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Re: unknown problem
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 18th August 2005 @ 07:31:44 PM AEST
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this is a really good poem...im into dark poetry alot...but the thing i dont like about it is that alot of it is true and realtes to much to life...i no...ive been there
~margaret~ |
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Re: unknown problem
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 18th August 2005 @ 10:24:53 PM AEST
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| you are not alone. everbody has been there at least once. Hope that you find brighter days. Good write |
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Re: unknown problem
(User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on
Friday, 19th August 2005 @ 12:01:35 AM AEST
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| Been there, Great write. Just remember you are never alone here. Peace to you, Laura |
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Re: unknown problem
(User Rating: 1 )
by han_rites_brill_poems on
Friday, 19th August 2005 @ 11:41:39 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| well done u brill at ritin dark poems keep goin very griping and emotional |
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