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beautiful
Contributed by
Don
on
Friday, 12th August 2005 @ 09:29:04 AM in AEST
Topic:
LoveRemembered
|
she showed me a poem she wrote
something about ants...
i didnt understand it
i didnt stand a chance
it was very weird
its meaning passed me by
i read her poem
and then i lied...
i said its beautiful, its a work of art
its beautiful, its rite from your heart
its beautiful, its outtasite
its beautiful...can i stay with you tonnite?
i almost told the truth
to that poetress so fine
almost, said her poem sucks
didnt even rhymn
but i thought about it
and how cold it was outside
i read her poem again
and once again i lied...
said its beautiful, its a work of art
its beautiful, its rite from your heart
its beautiful, its outtasite
its beautiful...she said i could stay with her the nite
i took a class in poetry
it almost blew my mind
they told me poems are about truth
and they dont have to rhymn
well is you see a poetress
from Tillamook, Oregon
tell her heres some truth
from her old friend Don,...
tell her, shes beautiful, shes a work of art
shes beautiful, i mean this from my heart
shes beautiful, she is outtasite
shes beautiful,...i miss her tonite
Copyright ©
Don
... [
2005-08-12 09:29:04]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: beautiful
(User Rating: 1 )
by poetrygirl1991 on
Friday, 12th August 2005 @ 11:24:57 AM AEST
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| this is a great poem keep writing, yew really have strong feelings for this person and would do anything to be with her !! best of luck to yew and please read my new poem called "the real thing" thanks great write~*Chrissy*~ |
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Re: beautiful
(User Rating: 1 )
by Shnannon on
Friday, 12th August 2005 @ 11:28:19 AM AEST
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| I really like this. It's a lesson learned. So many people don't understand how much our poetry means to us, and that it doesn't have to be a certain thing to make it poetry. Great job! |
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Re: beautiful
(User Rating: 1 )
by mom11159 on
Friday, 12th August 2005 @ 12:51:22 PM AEST
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I really loved this so different and unique your rhyming as well as the flow is great your imagery perfect and your words so very captivating put me into the poem to the end and was very informative also I learned a thing or two .
Excellent
Cathy |
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Re: beautiful
(User Rating: 1 )
by MorningDove on
Friday, 12th August 2005 @ 01:43:49 PM AEST
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Truth and emotion, how rare! I enjoyed this piece of work. Isn't it strange that out of a lie comes the truth and maybe love? It's a strange outcome but you are better for it.
Smiles,
Rita |
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Re: beautiful
(User Rating: 1 )
by ChromePlatedHrt on
Friday, 12th August 2005 @ 01:44:22 PM AEST
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| That was great. I enjoyed it. Maybe you should tell that poetress how much you miss her. Well done. |
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Re: beautiful
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Friday, 12th August 2005 @ 11:43:17 PM AEST
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I once showed one of my poems to a guy and got "Hmmmm.... interesting. Do you have the newspaper?" for a response. I pretty much lost interest right then. lol (well - it was that and a good handful of other reasons...)
So... it should come as no surprise that I was, I'll confess, rolling my eyes at you in the first half of the poem. (*wink*) Ah, but... you redeemed yourself nicely! The ending - AND - the write itself are sufficient evidence that you're not at all like the newspaper guy. : )
Well done...
~Snemmy |
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Re: beautiful
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 14th August 2005 @ 11:30:43 PM AEST
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You lied.. you have a real twist here..
i almost told the truth
to that poetress so fine
almost, said her poem sucks
didnt even rhymn
The before and after poetess..
I am glad your learned well in your writing class.
i took a class in poetry
it almost blew my mind
they told me poems are about truth
and they dont have to rhymn
You old rascal you lol.
Its hard to keep a straight face.. and to be quiet... not to laugh in my comments to you Don, but.. lol..
well is you see a poetress
from Tillamook, Oregon
tell her heres some truth
*****I miss my old friend too..
from her old friend Don,...
I miss her old friend too. Welcome home. Its been a long time.. I miss hearing you sing these songs.. miss seeing your smile..
Forever writing friends,
RLPoetess ; ))
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