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Worthless Help
Contributed by
PoisonousPyscho
on
Saturday, 30th July 2005 @ 10:04:04 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Worthless Help
I知 at the bottom of bottom
I知 in the darkest of dark
I知 missing is action
Gone without a mark
I知 waiting for help
A way out of this hole
But no one is helping
I知 left in the cold
I finally see a hand
That wants to pull me out
I let them take me with them
I did not have a doubt
When I thought I saw the light
The one that quickly ends the fight
I found I was in a deeper hole
Because they took me deeper, Trapping my soul
They left me there
All alone and afraid
Then they said they saved me
They acted all brave
They told me it was over
That there was nothing to fear
That they loved me and cared
That I was all that they held dear
But I did not listen
To their stupid lies
I knew they cared less
If I lived or died
Because, I知 at the bottom of bottom
I知 in the darkest of dark
I知 missing is action
Gone without a mark
Copyright ﾂｩ
PoisonousPyscho
... [
2005-07-30 22:04:04]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Worthless Help
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Saturday, 30th July 2005 @ 11:04:30 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| you have talent, and i think you could easily make the transition to formatted rhyme schemes. |
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Re: Worthless Help
(User Rating: 1 )
by xxbreathlessx on
Sunday, 31st July 2005 @ 12:57:24 AM AEST
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| i think theres an echo of desperation and lack of trust in this poem. it comes together nicely..but maybe you should try helping yourself and not let others take complete control of your destiny.gotta be strong in a world like this. anyways good write. |
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Re: Worthless Help
(User Rating: 1 )
by MorningDove on
Sunday, 31st July 2005 @ 01:34:24 AM AEST
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This is a mediocre write and I think you have the possibility to be much more prolific than this.
As far as helping you, YOU are the only one that can help you. When you get tired of being on the bottom, climb out and live up here with the rest of us that walk on our own two feet.
Dove |
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