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You Hurt me More
Contributed by
Adrianna
on
Saturday, 30th July 2005 @ 07:41:33 PM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
All the things you said to me were just a lie
Did you think you had to say those things to be with me
You hurt me more this way
Why did you have to say all those things
Those things that you know I loved
You hurt me more this way
When I think about what we used to be it makes me want to cry
I don’t understand why you did this to me
You hurt me more this way
All I ever wanted was you
I thought you wanted me
You hurt me more this way
All I ever did was love you
I thought you loved me too
You hurt me more this way
Copyright ©
Adrianna
... [
2005-07-30 19:41:33]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: You Hurt me More
(User Rating: 1 )
by PoeticLicense on
Saturday, 30th July 2005 @ 10:42:27 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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| This is not too bad a poem, though personally I think it's a little too focused on personal feelings to achieve its best form. But it's obvious you're working through this emotion, so keep on doing it. Just don't let yourself dwell on it any more than you have to. Poetry becomes stale that way, when we only make it the medium of our pain and unhappiness. Try some, say, nature poetry (or descriptive poetry of the city, if thats where you live). Something that you can write without your emotions taking center stage. The experience in both areas helps both: you get more emotion in other poems, and your emotional, personal poems become better. But don't stop writing. |
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Re: You Hurt me More
(User Rating: 1 )
by EmoDCgirl36 on
Wednesday, 3rd August 2005 @ 12:36:35 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| PoeticLicense is correct. Attach your emotions to something in your daily life. Or anything. When we talk about pain/sadness we poets like to connect it to an everyday object, event, etc. Depression is like a knife. Happiness is the sun, sadness is the rain. So yes keep on writing darling but start using metaphors, similes and whatnot. Love you darling. Hehe |
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