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3 Voices
Contributed by
PuppyChow
on
Friday, 29th July 2005 @ 07:07:49 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
i asked you for help
you turned down my cry
even if you'd said yes
knowing you, that'd be a lie
if you dont want to back me up
it's okay, i know three that will
they're the voices inside my head
which rarely, which ever, still
theres dozens of others out there
who, for some reason, acted like you
they share the same trait of coldness
they refused to help me too
fortunatly my brain made up
for the huge mistake you made
i have new advisors for me
my thoughts, they constantly raid
so maybe my actions aren't confirmed
in any way close to sane
but at least im shielded from that knowledge
the voices filter that from my brain
you don't want to back me up
it's okay i know three that will
they're the voices inside my head
which rarely, if ever, still
Copyright ©
PuppyChow
... [
2005-07-29 19:07:49] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: 3 Voices
(User Rating: 1 ) by hardrocker15198916 on
Friday, 29th July 2005 @ 08:18:05 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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magnificent
i think its a little comfort friendly
but lacking just a little
its still good though
--> Rae |
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Re: 3 Voices
(User Rating: 1 ) by dreamer_4_eternity on
Friday, 29th July 2005 @ 08:41:36 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I really like this, it's odd, but that's why i like it... it's not the ordinary stuff I always read on this site, and your original theme of this really makes the poem awesome... along with the last stanza, which i loved! |
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Re: 3 Voices
(User Rating: 1 ) by je2ica3 on
Friday, 29th July 2005 @ 10:34:57 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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good write |
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Re: 3 Voices
(User Rating: 1 ) by Kie-Kie on
Friday, 29th July 2005 @ 11:23:53 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I must admit that I don't have this particular problem (which I have to say, lately seems to be a rarity) but you've created a very interesting poem out of it... I hope things become less confusing soon
Love ya'll,
~Kiela~ |
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Re: 3 Voices
(User Rating: 1 ) by Essentially9 on
Friday, 29th July 2005 @ 11:28:57 PM AEST (User
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impressive. what would be more useful even still would be the use of capitalization. good ending, and a good rhythm which i hardly come across. |
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Re: 3 Voices
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Saturday, 30th July 2005 @ 01:30:24 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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What a captivating peice of poetry, well written and interesting to read, voices
if harmonious can be most revealing,
very nice poem . . .
Ben |
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Re: 3 Voices
(User Rating: 1 ) by Saint_41 on
Sunday, 31st July 2005 @ 01:53:20 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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great write |
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